Feels like a lot of talk?

My girlfriend seems to only appreciate me when I'm not there. we are in a long distance relationship. shell say things like I miss you, do you know how lucky I am to have you? I'm so proud of you? then when I'm with her she's very demanding and tries to control everything we do. the other night she says how she feel she takes and takes from me and doesn't know how to give to me and then got mad at me for that...and when it comes to sex, she will bring it up and say she wants to kiss me so much when were in my car, but when we get there she just hugs me and says we have to go. shell bring up sex and talk about it but when were alone shy away from it...i just feel like I'm in a relationship where what she's saying she wants and thinks and what does and how she acts don't match...i recently drove an hour to see her for a few hours then when we had an opportunity to b alone she insisted on helping her camp group, who she was with, but they told her twice to go and it was her day off, she insisted on helping 3 times to them so they relented. and instead of spending the limited time she had with me she dragged me alone to help with her camp for 45 mins...then I had to drive her to her bus 20 min away, and drive an hour home...how do I even approach this? I'm kinda tired of giving her everything she asks for.


Most Helpful Girl

  • How long have you been seeing her? Sometimes if I am w/a guy I really want to have sex with but want to wait to be sure he likes me as a person (etc.) it is hard. I find myself making sexual remarks (sometimes a little shocking or out of the blue remarks). It is my release and then I feel better (sounds weird I know). I certainely wouldn't say sexual things to a guy if I wasn't wanting it from him, but it is quite possible that she is using you (a very slight possibility).

    You did say you drove an hour to see her, but just ended up helping her w/her work and DRIVING her to her bus stop then going home. Sometimes women use sex as a form of manipulation (thinking it will keep you coming back if they tease you but don't actually do it).

    Try to give it to her the minute she makes a comment -- for instance, if you are driving and she makes a comment, say (with complete confidence) something sexual back that you woudl like to do to her. See how she responds, she might not be expecting it, but you could pull over and starat kissing her and touching her... (drive home immediatly if you are really in public if not then do it right there)... hahahahaha... if she rejects you in that moment, then you need to talk to her about it. Good luck.

    • we've been together a year August. and know each 2 years March. I couldn't pull over because she had to catch a bus, so I was rushing on the highway back, and she got on the bus exactly a second before it left.

    • For that one instance perhaps she wanted sex then but because she had to catch the bus she just turned off the passion. Some women need a build up to it. Next time if she does that in the car you can try it out-perhaps.. or where ever she does it, indulge her a little, tease her and then go for it.

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • I understand were you're coming from. She could either be just wanting a not in person relationship like via texting and just calling or she don't know how bring herself to it. On the sex portion of it, does she really want to or does she feel pressured because you do? I suggest the next time she says she wants to kiss you when your in your car and she doesn't approach her about. Tell her you want to be with her and how you feel like you're the only one trying. Don't get mad and listen to what she says. I know with my ex that was one of our problems, but it was that I felt like he was the one who should make the first move and I was sick and tired of doing it. Best of luck!

    • the problem isn't that I'm pressuring her, she's the one that brought up sex, then when the time came just wanted me to drive her to the bus. and I did initiate, I'm a very passionate person and believe that when your with someone you give them your full attention, in zen sort of way lol. I just don't know why shed want to waste 45 min when she knew she had to go soon and I was right there, it seemed she wanted to socialize with her camp councillor friends...

  • dont give her everything she asks for. It's good that she's not involving herself in sex with a long distance man. Do you pland on ever moving closer, or her to you?

    • no we have sex. but she brings it up and then when I try to initiate it she shys away. for example I had pulled my back a bit and she even said jokingly "u think your up for kneeling in the back of your car" but when we got to my car I started kissing her and she wasn't kissing me back with any passion and then said we had to go. why would she get me worked up, and its not like she referenced sex once she did it like 4 5 times before we got to the car, and then left me hanging.

What Guys Said 0

Be the first guy to share an opinion
and earn 1 more Xper point!

Loading... ;