I met this guy and then he says this on a date why!?

met this guy online, he seemed legit like he went to my college and everything ironically and well everything seemed cool. Met up with him and omg he was weird. Like I didn't like his mannerisms and he seemed like he didn't really have much of a life outside of work. Even had difficulty answering the question "what do you do for fun?"

I'm an outgoing person, and I talked because I don't like super long silences... but from the moment I met him I knew he wasn't attracted. He didn't even pay for my coffee. During the date he even said because we met on the plentyoffish dating site that I should "keep finishing" . And he mocked me. And also I told him some guy msged me on Facebook saying "do you want to be my boss?" 5 min later he said I should take this guy up on the offer.

I didn't think I was THAT ugly I honestly don't I mean for a guy like that SUPER DEPRESSING. yes he was cute but his personality and quirks made him a turn-off. I think I'm a good catch tho I have a good personality, I'm very nice and I'm pretty smart.

Can anybody help me recover from this date, sadly its the first "date" I've ever been on and I'm 20.


Most Helpful Guy

  • You're not 20, you're 25 to 29... right?

    The odds are that you're going to have bad dates off of plentyoffish.com because they don't really have any decent matching methods. A few lame quizzes, and still you have to do the searching for people who took that particular quiz and see if you're ''compatible'' according to this 15 question matching method.

    Relaxing on a date is hard. Dates are considered formal these days anyway, so doing the coffee thing is the simplest way to bail early. Try getting out of a dinner and a playhouse opening with two or three friends on the cast, and reservations. The postmodern method is better.

    When you've decided you don't like the person you're with, just enjoy the small talk, or do what I do. Politely f*** with them, if they're that bad at conversation. Then say how great a time you've had but there's this other person you've been meeting for drinks and you've decided to date them. No hard feelings, you just don't feel like you'll be eating fondue with them anytime soon.

    • I told this guy I had to meet one of my friends after. When I looked at my phone he was like "are you texting sos" what a weirdo. Also when I left I made a point to shake his hand lol

    • Show All
    • LOL. what is that suppose to me eh?

    • The guys are worse. They're unshaven, greasy haired/nosed/eared, with food stains on their shirts and missing teeth. To compensate they wear jewelry. When the server comes by he stares at her ass when she walks away, flirts with her at the table, and tries to get her number. Then he says his wallet is missing, in his other pants, or he gives her a card that gets declined. And he looks pregnant from the side view.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Here's the thing: there are a lot of insecure/inexperienced/not sociallly sophisticated people on dating sites. And, yes, some are just plain WEIRD.

    Don't let that bother you. The purpose of these kinds of dates is to give each other a tryout. You shouldn't expect a 100% success rate, or anything even close. A 40% success rate would actually be pretty good, which is 2 out of 5.

    The point of these dates is to not let yourself get attached. These people are really total strangers to you, and you need to get to know them before you let yourself get attached in any way or put any weight on their opinions, and part of that process means that you're going to eliminate many of them within the first 10 minutes. That's just how it goes.

    So, nothing unexpected happened. Just try again, and keep trying until something clicks.


What Girls Said 2

  • Mam, is this the person you are talking about?


    lol. I think he was just being a jerk and that it really sucks that he had to be your first date. Not all guys are like that and hopefully you can talk to the next guy and try to get a better understanding of what type of guy he is.

    • LOL

      he seemed sort of weird even in text. Actually most of the guys online are a bit weird, but what can I do its not like other guys in real life approach.

    • I don't know I suppose it depends on the guys you talk to. I would try to stay away from the men who give you a bad feeling or seem weird (in a bad way). You can meet guys at work, through friends and much more. Just have to be confident within yourself and try to put yourself out there a little =)

  • You weren't attracted to him, he wasn't attracted to you. It works both ways.