Am I overthinking or am I trapped in a game?

If a guy says he interested in you, he will text you right? If the only time he text back is when you text him first, is that a bad thing? If you text a guy in 3 minutes tops only to get 30 minute responds and sometimes nothing in a day, should you be worried? If this guy texted you everyday till your date then afterward you end up texting him everyday because he claims to have a busy week, should that be no problem? If you two agreed to try a relationship, both parties would try to make time out of no time to make sure the other party knows that they're trying?

So many questions that I have but they all lead to the same thing, is this guy still interested and wants to try for a relationship or should I just drop the ball and move on? I don't want to chase him if I'm just going to run into a dead end. Whenever I tell myself to stop contacting him, he will text me out of the blue or say something to me on fb and I'll end up texting (chasing) him because I'm thinking he's still interested..but when I feel as if we can actually make this work, he's either too tired from work (we work at the same place and to me, it's nothing to make you sleep all day) or just not thinking about me at all. Even on the days that he's off, I get nothing unless I text him. I know he's a texter because when we first got each others' numbers we texted all the time and he always has his phone with him so there is nothing stopping him from texting me unless he's just not interested anymore and likes to have girls chasing him. Our friends at work says he's not like that but that's all I'm getting. How could we go from blushing like crazy because we like each other till me crying every night wondering why he doesn't like me the way I like him. We agreed to this and before he said we wouldn't have time to see each other..he said nothing about not having time to TALK to each other. I just don't get this and I don't even know which category to put this in because we're in a pseudo-relationship that formed after our date and I don't understand him at all yet I'm the one whose hard to figure out..I just don't get any of this. Do I walk, do I wait, do I stay, what do I do?


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What Guys Said 1

  • He might be busy and just can't get back to you right then and there. And that's a good thing---a guy with a real future! Does he go to school as well?

    You mentioned you work at the same place--could it be that this is a problem?

    Anyway, give him the benefit of the doubt until it's clear he doesn't deserve it.

    • Us working in the same place is how we met so I'm glad about that and since our schedules are like day and night, work has no problem with us. Other than our date, work is where we usually see each other. He's not in school right now but you right, he does have a future.

      I'll give him the benefit, it just felt so good to vent and have some clarity of this whole whirlwind of a relationship. When we talk, he does make things better...thank you for your answer <3

What Girls Said 1

  • I think I'm in the same situation as you. He is also hot and cold. When I don't text him, he texts me. When I text him, he replies nonchalantly. When he asks me out, he plans every details. When I asks him out, he either seems uninterested or even refuses. It's like he only plays and enjoys the games according to his own rules. Lately, when I think he totally doesn't respect me at all, I just start ignoring him

    Just let him have a taste of his own medicine. If he's sincere in the relationship with you, even just a bit, he'd change his attitude. Otherwise, just forget him and move on. There's no point paying attention to a childish player.

    • It just seems so off. Before the whole "let's try the relationship" talk things were non-stressful. He told me the reason why he didn't want one was because we wouldn't have time for each other..I always thought he meant to see each other. But now I see what he was talking about. With the whole texting thing, I will not text unless he text first mainly because it takes a second to send a text and shouldn't take 30 minutes each time. We'll see where this goes, thanks for your answer <3