Am I ruining my chances that?

Thinking I need and deserve a really hot guy in my life? I'm scared to date an unattractive guy but I've seen that those are the ones that treat me exactly how I wanted to be treated. There's this guy I always called a friend. He's 22 and I will be 23 years old next month. We've know each other for 4 years and he has his own, no kids, no baggage. Free like me and we get along so well and are very compatible, but he's not the best looking guy and his kind of big but I'm starting to look past that because I like the way he treats. he treats me like a queen and puts me on a pedestal and I can be myself around him, but then there is that little thing that keeps saying "you can get a better looking guy and that I'm settling" Is this all in my unrealistic world inside my head? does that even matter? by the way I am considered very attractive and I kind of don't want the super sexy guy anymore. I am now thinking of my future and want a man that's stable, knows how to treat a lady, and etc...advice on this please...


Most Helpful Guy

  • I wonder, what makes you think you "deserve" a hot guy in your life? I'm curious how you came up with that conclusion...

    • Society But as I asked this question, I realized I don't give a dam about looks anymore and that it was just inside my head. I want this guy for him, not what he has even though its a change because I am always dating guys that are felonies or has kids they don't take care of...

    • This is why we have to learn to see beyond looks. We all want a hot girl/guy in our life but the hot girls I've dealt with, believe me, they are just so disappointing, being in personality or intelligence. The girl I like right now is cute, nerdy cute (glasses, likes to read, smart) and while there are hotter women than her, the way she makes me feel when I talk to her makes me forget that other women exist and it is then that you realize that there's more in life than being "hot".

    • Best answer goes to you. you were way more helpful than anyone else and that was the point I was trying to make. This guy makes me feel special and we click, we always did. so imma give us a chance..Thank you !

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What Guys Said 3

  • You need to let him go forever,not even friends. You have made it clear that looks are very important to you. You are probably ashamed to be seen with him, so if you have any kindness in your heart you will end it now.

    • I used to feel that way in the past, but not now. I am realizing looks are not that important and he treats me like a queen which is why I am gonna keep him an shower him back with my love, thanks though :)

    • I would think you could pretty him up at least a bit. Get him hiking or something to get some weight off. Use some other methods to improve everything else, just do it gradually and don't let it be obvious.

    • he used to be a football player in high school and he works out everyday. he not blubber fat, he just has really big muscles, he dresses nice and keeps his hair cut so I think he's good :)

  • Being put on a pedestal is bullsh*t. Not being attracted physically to your SO is bullsh*t and thinking that good looking guys cannot treat you with love and respect is silly.

    • no its not...good looking guys are full of themselves. as to where my guy is humble, hard workr and treats me like a queen...enough said

    • Bullsh*t

  • are you attracted to him? if so go for it but if you aren't then don't


What Girls Said 1

  • -Shakes head- You are the type some guys on here whine about.

    But I guess I'll try to help. Do what you think is right and what you want to do w/o hurting anyone in the process. And a stable man does not necessarily equal an unattractive man

    • Very true. I think the more we talk, the more I like him because were on the same page. like tonight he texted me and said he was thinking about us and our future and I got all excited because I been thinking about us all day too. he has goals and so do i. we just seem like a good fit and I want to see where things goes between us.

    • Well that's good. But if you can't get past thinking that you are settling and that you can get a better looking guy there are going to be issues