If I want to start things up again, what's my next move? and how do I make sure I'm respected this time around?

OK so I met this guy online we talked for a long time and eventually hung out and even hook up once somewhat starting a purely physical relationship...well one night I was supposed to meet him out he text me to confirm that, I would myself, be there I called 5mins later and he wasn't picking up the phone or returning my messages and long story short I was stood up...

Very confused and hurt I went home that night deleted him from Facebook (he had added me just 2hours prior to him standing me up) and tried to sleep it off in the morning I wrote him a rather nasty message telling him I didn't want anything to do with him ever. Then I stalked his page (which is opened) waiting for him to post just to confirm he wasn't dead or in jail.

Sure enough a few days later he post a happy like he didn't care at all what had happened and so it has now been 2 months sense we've spoken. I decided to look at his page out of curiosity the other day and saw where he had written a poem expressing his retreat over "something " he had done one night and that he's a different person and wants to fight to reconnect with someone but he saw no hope.

So I decided I wanted to at least open the door for an apology because he seemed sincere, so I friend requested him it took all of 2mins for me to get a notification saying he had accepted but it has now been 2 days and no response...what gives?

Did I do the right thing by ME friend requesting. HIM what's my next move if I want to salvage this?


Most Helpful Girl

  • He may not have been talking about you; but you being in "self absorbed stalker mode" convinced yourself to believe that his poem was about you. Because if it was really about you, he would not have waited two days in counting to reply to your message. Sorry hun, but I think he just viewed you as a hit it and quit it, easy sex type chick and nothing more. His behavior shows that he doesn't have any interest in you other than your "purely physical relationship". He doesn't even respect you enough to say "hello :)" or "sorry for not replying to you". That's why you can't just approach a guy and say with your actions "I'm an easy girl whom you can get easy sex out of." because they 9/10 times don' respect you and don't view you as dating material; just "screwing material". You can't just present yourself like "I'm a ho;screw me" it looks bad and leads to situations like this.

    • But if he wants nothing to do with me why did he accept my request? :/ and I really don't think I'm nodding myself with what he wrote..it had elements of what I wrote in a message to him

    • You're trying to convince yourself that you are relevant to his life when in reality, his actions show that you are not.

      If he really wanted something to do with you, then he would SPEAK TO YOU. He would reply to your messages. He would have been eager to communicate with you. He wouldn't be ignoring you every time you reach out to him with the exception of sexual things.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • You should look for someone better who actually is interested in more than just the physical.


What Girls Said 1

  • You seriously want someone like that ?

    • I thought that we could've been friends and we clicked really well which ducks even more...

    • That's life. Focus on other stuff. You don't know him enough to say that. Read the Annon. Post.