How to be the guy girls want while STILL being myself?

I know you like guys who are sweet and caring, but that's not ALL you want! After lots of reading up on psychology I learned that attraction is a lot more complicated in your brains.

So tell me all the little things that attract you and turn you on that don't normally tell us guys. I know you have them! (I wasn't born yesterday!) Please describe in DETAIL and practical terms so that I can steal your secrets and use them against you.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm not sure what your individualized plan would be, but here are some general tips:

    1. Women ARE visual, but less than men are. So -- work out, groom yourself, find a style that looks good on you and suits your personality.

    2. Smell is one of women's most important senses. Wear just a touch of cologne so we can inhale your phermones.

    3. A lot of women fall for funny guys -- try to let your natural humor shine through, instead of worring about saying the "right" thing.

    4. Know your audience. Women like familiarity as much as excitement. If you love music, talk to girls who love music. Know a lot about movies -- talk to girls who like movies. Sports -- talk to sporty chicks. Too many guys just make a checklist of physical traits and blindly ask out every girl who looks that way, without regard to her personality and if he even really wants to talk to her.

    5. ^ When talking about these things, instead of trying to show off your knowlege or "one up" them, as guys sometimes do when talking to guys ... share a personal experience. "I went to see (movie) when it was in the theater. I loved (part you loved). Or "I saw (band you both like) last summer. Let me tell you a funny story about what me and my friends did that night."

    • are you sure women are less visual than men are?

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    • Ok thanks. BUT I try to do exactly what you said and I haven't had success with any girls. Maybe I'm just "casting my pearls before swine?" Not trying to rude, but that's the best analogy I can think of.

    • It's hard for me to say anything more specific without knowing you...

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 4

  • i would have to say:

    *hugs from behind definitely because I'm a huge hug person, I love giving hugs.

    *cuddling-during a movie, just cuz, or in bed (no sex)

    *definitely nicknames

    *give me your fav hoodie

    *i think sleeping on a trampoline and/or in the bed of a truck are extremely sexy

    *texting me before you go to work or before you go to bed

    *holding hands

    *being opinionated, but not in the way that it makes me feel stupid

    *im a loud/talkative person, so if you are loud and talkative that's a plus

    *i like it when guys cry, not in a weird-i-like-making-guys-cry way, but in the way that it shows that they are sensitive

    *letting me do things with him and the guys (but not all the time, just occasionaly)

    *i love talking on the phone

    *open to different things-you don't have to agree with it or like it but at least be willing to listen

    *occasional swearing is OK, but not when every other word is a swear word

    idk... does that help at all?

    • I meant when ATTRACTING a girl. Not when you already have her, because I CAN'T - for the life of me - ATTRACT a girl.

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    • So, can you add anything more?

    • ummm I can't really think of anything at this moment, but I totally agree with ANON who commented above me... sorry, I'm not much help :(

  • If certain characteristics aren't you don't fake them, you can't act that way forever. Why not get a girl that just likes you for you.

    But since you asked, for me it's little displays of strength, skill, passion, ambition, philosophy or dominance. No more than that though, work the rest out.

  • I don't really know of any quick tricks but I love a guy that can make me laugh. Not in that Bam Margera and Johnny Knoxville in Electric Avenue way but a genuinely funny guy. A guy that can just be himself, plus why would you want to be with someone you have to "trick" into being with you unless you are just trying to get some ass? Lol.

  • Hmm...that's a tough on because most times girls don't know what we want. I won't speak for everyone, but as for myself...

    1) hugs from behind are a huge turn on for me, I love leaning back against a guy's chest as his arms wrap around me :)

    2) honestly, being a bit of a playful jerk can be really attractive (I know that might not make a lot of sense)...don't take that the wrong way, but teasing us and being incredibly confident can be sexy; however, don't go over the top and be rude

    3) nicknames are really cute and can make a girl feel special

    4) you don't have to be mushy to be sweet. Shoot us a text with something simple like a smiley face or at night say sweet dreams...Invite me to play video games with you (not when you're with the guys, just the two of us) it can be fun competition!

    5) cuddling is always a plus! Girls like feeling safe and protected so what better way than to be wrapped in your arms :)

    6) give us your favorite sweatshirt or a tshirt. If it smells like you and reminds us of you, chances are we'll love to wear it (especially to bed)

    7) you don't have to spend your money, just spend your time with us. If you want to give us a gift, stuffed animals are cute and remind us of you :)

    Not sure if this helped at all, but just be yourself and try to let her know you're thinking of her and you care


What Guys Said 2

  • you can't do it.cause the side of you that gets women will always be a hurtful jerk and is the truth no matter what women say the love to be on there toes.when they figure you out there bored and find ways to move on. when your asking yourself why this girl is laying on me? your other side says oh yeah you saw her weakness and you ran with that shyt bro now she stuck to you.

  • read "The Game" by Neil Strauss

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