No responses as of yet :/ someone maybe help?

Ok I was seeing this boy for a short time there. He called it off after a month because he felt confused and wasn't sure what he wanted and didn't want to mess me around. We did kind of rush things and it was hard to slow down because we both really liked each other. So I respected his thoughts and left him be, although he carried on chatting to me as we normally would, which confused me.

We ended up arguing because he kept giving me mixed signals and I didn't know how I should act around him. We were out 2 weeks ago at our local bar each with our group of friends. He seemed awkward when speaking to me but still interested in me at the same time and I felt nervous because things seemed slightly different. Me being slightly drunk and him being unable to even walk by the end of the night thought I'd offer to see him home. I ended up staying at his and we kissed. He then said"we shouldn't be doing this" so we never kissed again. He gave me pyjamas and we fell asleep.

Come the morning I left him sleeping and left his alone. I never spoke to him that week because I was upset and confused. However he drunk texted me on Friday asking how I was and if I hated him. Obviously I said no. The drunk texting resumed on Saturday when he said he had been OK with me staying at his and wanted me to be safe. He said he thought he had offended me when he woke up in the morning and I wasn't there. I did admit he had said some crazy stuff when drunk. The conversation stopped there.

However he texted me sober yesterday wondering how I was and what I'd been upto at the weekend, where I'd been, who I'd been with etc. I'd said I had been at the gym and he said "why? I've told you 8 million times you have an amazing body, you don't need to tone up!" and just small comments like that. He referred to a time we'd spent together as well. I told him I was off to watch a horror with my friend and he told me I was really good with horror movies. He seemed sad but happy whilst talking to me and I almost felt as if he might have been missing me. He was sensitive again as well just as always!

Just to inform you, what we had before was great! He had just ended a relationship with his ex and wasn't ready to get into another relationship instantly and had taken a proper liking to me. I stayed over a few times and he'd make me dinner and breakfast. We'd snuggle watch films and talk for hours and connected so so well! He'd give me such soft stares when we kissed and I could feel that he appreciated me. He'd play with my hair and always tell me how beautiful and pretty I was and how he loved the color of my eyes. He'd even suggested I attend his Grandmother Golden Wedding! And we'd decided I should buy a red dress.

I just don't know where to go from here, because I did ask him to clarify if we were over for good when we split and he said yes. He seemed to even be trying to move on from me instantly to start with. Now I'm not so sure.

I don't know what I should do here?


Most Helpful Girl

  • First of all - take a deep breath!

    To me it sounds like this - he got out of a relationship. Its usually the time to lick your wounds, get back to your old self and establish who it is you are. He met you really early while still in the process and genuinely liked you. Then he might have been wondering - "Am I being honest with her or am I just trying to get over my ex, am I using her? She's a great girl and does not deserve to be used." So basically I think he has been f***ing his own head up here!

    You did a good thing then, giving him space to assess his feelings and now it seems he's gotten around to the fact that he DOES like you and wants you in his life, but is now unsure whether he has ruined his chance with you by being an undecided moron at first.

    So what I'd suggest you do is - meet up! How about another nice night of watching movies and cooking together? He's confused, so you might have to be the confident one here. You like him, you don't mind taking it slow, so now all we need to know is, does he want to keep hanging out and seeing you and would he like to see where things are going with you.

    A nice conversation in a nice environment should get that straight!

    Good luck!

    PS.: Personally, I think your chances look really good though. He seems to care about you heaps!


    • thank you,I'd really like that. Just very nervous and kinda unsure of how to start a conversation with him. I hope he'd like to spend a night together I certainly would! Thanks so much for advice :) xxx

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What Guys Said 3

  • Hmmm. I read your "best answer", and have to say that I disagree. While it does sound as though he likes you, it seems equally clear to me that he's ambivalent, perhaps in part due to his recent break-up. I'd give him some time and some distance. Tell him that you like him, that spending time with him is lovely, but that it appears to you that he needs an opportunity to gain some perspective after his last relationship. Tell him that you'd love to meet for a coffee (or whatever) in a month (or 2 or 3). Go ahead and set a date now, but I'd completely disengage until then. It seems that alcohol is no friend to your relationships either. Best of luck...

  • It seems like he's getting feelings again? He sounds confused himself actually.

    • I have no idea! Yeah he said he was confused and would probably regret things. He just seemed kinda gloom and asked me what I was going to be doing last night, unfortunately I was busy. I'm curious to know ifhe was gonna ask me to do something...

  • Well he wasn't exactly flirting with you, compliments might have been just friendly.

    I'd say just keep talking with him, see what else he says or does. At this point, you should still take his word on being split for good.


What Girls Said 0

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