Guys: why message me and then not reply to me?

This guy will message me asking how things are etc, the convo will last a few messages & then he will stop replying! I make sure in my responses I ask him questions so he has reason to reply. Why initiate convo in the first place if you're not interested?

ALSO - thanks to the "seen" notification on Facebook I know he sees my messages but sometimes doesn't reply for like 7 hours! What is with that?!?!


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What Guys Said 3

  • Depends how long he is REALLY on Facebook, not just online but physically sitting at the computer. Then it depends if we want to deal with something that moment, or if we just don't know what to say. The thing is that it is not a Guys thing, we all do this. Since the nature of Text and Messages is not one that requires an immediate response we are given to the light that we have all the time we need to think of an appropriate reply. If it were a phone call everyone has to react to each other in real time.

    • He is rarely if ever online on computer - he uses his phone.

      But why does he start a convo and not continue it?

    • Ah well I do it all the time myself. I will look at my phone see I have a message, then something will distract me (School or work usually for me) and I'll forget I had the message until later to which I see it.

  • Probably your reply was dry

  • "I make sure in my responses I ask him questions so he has reason to reply"

    That's so annoying.

    As a guy, I don't text to start a conversation. I text because I want to know something or tell you something (which isn't urgent, and can wait).

    When I see a girl then deliberately try to start a conversation with me, over *text*, it's annoying.

    You'll get a reply when I'm good and ready to send one. If that's 7 hours or 7 days later, so be it.

    • Perhaps I needed more punctuation:

      "I make sure in my responses I ask him questions, so he has reason to reply"

      As in I don't rattle off about myself I show interest in him & what he is doing. if he asks how my weekend was I'll ask the same back. I don't ask so he HAS to reply, but I would normally expect a response when I ask a question.

      So, if you send a message asking about my weekend you'd prefer me to just say "great thanks", and nothing more?

    • Show All
    • I am being serious. Consider this one of the many ways guys are different to girls.

      If I want to know about your weekend in detail, we'll talk - either in person or on the phone. If I just want a quick answer of how it was (like, if it was crap, you might be in need of cheering up and special attention, and maybe a phone call right now), then I just send a text, and I just want a straight answer, not a text-based-conversation.

    • Haha, OK. People that meet me sometimes say I seem aloof in person so I am trying so hard not to be. Maybe I am ballsing it up even more by being too chatty. Shit! OK, lesson learnt. It .just seems strange. Hear nothing for 2 weeks & then get a "How was your weekend?". Guys! Thanks for the advice. I'll give it a go :)

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