What does he wantt? Relationship or sex?

I work with him. I poked him on Facebook and from there we started flirting. Its been a week and a half and I slept over 3 nights ago, no sex just make out cuddling, talking and some dry humping. I don't know if that made me seem easy? I'm a virgin and this was the first time I ever did anything with a guy. But he was sweet in the beginning giving me good morning and good night texts and complimenting me. I told him I liked him when I slept over and he said he really likes me (not sure if he did it to keep the mood) he told me why, cause I'm different, smart etc. I asked about his past relationships and he was open about it. But anyways. Yesterday and today he didn't text me until 9pm. He said he had work and played basket ball and I was okay with that until he asked if I could give him a bj for his birthday if I was comfortable with it, I said definitely no. And he tried to keep texting me but that question annoyed me so much I said I was tired and going to bed and he said sweet dreams. Ughh, is he using me for sexual things or does he really like me? I don't know about this dating stuff, I've never done it.


Most Helpful Girl

  • With the dry humping, he probably hopped on that rocket and is waiting to depart from earth...now if "you're" hoping for a respectable relationship with him all hope isn't lost just yet.

    You can redeem yourself by no longer engaging in sexual activity with him, but doing things like you stated really has him thinking he's going to get lucky sooner or later. If you wish to not be viewed in a sexual manner like this you have to show it.

    No damn bj, my apology, that was a natural reflex.lol

    • Should I have a talk with him about what he really wants?

    • That might be best, ask him what his true intentions are...now he might lie "might" but pay attention to what he does (actions speak louder than words) if he isn't respecting your wishes I would let him loose.

    • I'm hanging out with him tomorrow, I'll set things straight then. Thanks for your help!

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What Guys Said 4

  • You're asking the wrong question. Every guy wants sex, endofstory.

    whether or not he wants a relationship along with the sexor not is the real question.

    You can give a guy a little bit of sex, and even if he's the nicest guy in the world with no intention of hurting you or anything, he will try to get more,because you set the tone that it was OK. You can't blame him for being a guy, especially since you pretty much gave him the go ahead with the dry humping and such. It's his conclusion that you're cool with a physical relationship, and the next step for him is a bj.

    This is not to say that he is a bad guy or doesn't want a relationship. Forexample, I had an ex who on the second date I ended up over at her place in much the samesituation you were in with him. As guys we enjoy physicality, so we attempt to takethings further. I still ended up in a relationship with here becauseit was clear that's what she wanted as did I.

    Just slow downthe physical aspect andsee if he wants to go on dates and spend time with you out side the bed.

  • I'm not going to just flat out say he wants just sex but the percentage is high, I mean he's human. Since you're a virgin don't have sex because that's a great thing to be. Cherish that because that will separate you from other women in the future. Fornicating is a sin and I have sex pretty often but you don't need to do it. Wait until marriage and focus on school and establishing a career and guys will be ready to be in a monogamous relationship with you.

    • Do you think I should talk to him about it or just flat out never talk to him again?

  • He wants sex

  • I'd say it's for sex he's after...


What Girls Said 1

  • Hard to know from what you've said...but he's a teenage boy...without being too generalising too much, they generally just want sex.


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