How to turn this girlfriend into a lover?

This has been my struggle for some time now. Here's my situation and I would THANK so greatly anyone that gives me insightful advice.

I met a girl 3 years ago at high school (we're both out of high school now)

We started to hang out, go outside, I made her laugh, we had fun together, and I confessed all my feelings for her (which she thought it was a courageous thing to do). She rejected me every time (you know how it hurts badly), but she felt guilty about it.

I did a lot of mistakes (like letting her know how I felt about her various times) the weird thing is that she kept talking to me, she kept texting me, and she missed me when she didn't see me for a while (she still does that to this day), obviously, she didn't want to lose me.

Throughout our "friendship", she dated some guys, short term relationships. I can be kind of jealous, and each time she had a boyfriend, I would back up , I would disappear from her life and not talk to her, cause it hurts emotionally. But she kept texting me, and I would act less friendly with her.

Each time one of her relationships were over, she would want to see me, talk to me more, etc.

That happened 3 years ago. Two years ago, she told me she was kind of attracted to me, though it was in a short period of time and then she doesn't know what happened and lost the "feeling".

Right now, as of today, we keep hanging out, she's single, we do fun things, we spend time together. She knows I have feelings for her, she knows it clearly, yet she wants to see me and talk to me. I have a really strong physical contact with her, (I even caress her hair and sometimes her legs!) and yet she still sees me as a friend. I flirt sometimes with her, I don't compliment her too much.

I've been struggling for years and I'm not a bad looking guy either, so I'm not that screwed. So if you can help me, I would thank you a lot. You would save a fellow man get out of such situation.

What should I do people?


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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • Sounds like she just wants you there to keep her confidence up and make her feel like guys want her. I think you shouldn't let her just keep playing with your emotions. I know its hard. Sorry D:

    • A lot of guys want her and she prefers to go out with me every time. She has a big heart, I doubt she would act like that just to play with my emotions. Thanks for your answer though :)

    • I second thing, my sister is married to an amazing man yet still loves attention from other men no matter who. It's flattering and it's clear she has you on the back burner.. women do use men for affection, and I'm sorry. :(

What Guys Said 1

  • Show some assertiveness. Seems like she's just stringing you along.

    Before you do this though you have to consider whether or not you want this to potentially cost you your friendship with her. You must be okay with this.

    • Thanks for your answer, I'll consider that, although I always show assertiveness when I'm with her.

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