Girls what's your view on this?

Everything bad and good happened in this relationship too long to explain but basically she started playing around with this 'i need space' thing and 2 weeks later decided she wanted a break up. I took it very hard but eventually accepted our 2 year relationship was over. However in the past 2 months it's been constant back and fourths of one minute we are talking next minute we end up arguing about something, mainly Because of the way I had reacted towards the break up. But as of recently we have been getting on well and we talk about twice a week.

Anyway yesterday she came back from a 2 week family holiday and called me because she wanted to talk about a text I sent her explaining I want her in my life but not as a girlfriend and I would like if we were friends, with no restrictions (she keeps saying she doesn't want to come see me because she doesn't want to see me and have emotions floating back to her again and I keep trying to explain our relationship is over we both don't want to be a couple at the moment so what's the problem but she's not hearing word of it - she's quite stubborn).

We ended up talking for about 2 hours and things got emotional mainly when we started talking about an abort**n she got about 4 months ago which even made my eyes watery at that point because it was a thing where the decision to get rid of the child was rushed and we never discussed it properly at the time and now we were it was too late and we came to the conclusion that we both would have liked to keep the baby (I'm not to sure if that's Because we've broken up and I see that as a reason we would still be together)

Anyway my question is why is she so emotional and so stubborn saying she doesn't want a reltionship or refusing to come see me or being so difficult when all I wanna do is hang out with a girl that I once saw as my best friend. How do I convince her that seeing me doesn't me mean we would end up together again or her feeling as if she wants to get back with me. And I also don't understand why seeing me and having emotions come back is such a bad thing, our relationship wasn't perfect and we argued a lot but for the most part before cheating (on both sides) was involved we were closer than ever and are still close today, I know everything about her inside out. I find it so annoying that she screwed up a good thing and I am all for moving on from the past but what if you have a gut feeling not to give up on something you believe is so right, what then? I think we should one day get back together not now but defo one day so what is her problem.

How do I get through to her. She clearly still wants something to do with me or else she wouldn't call or even entertain a 2 hour phone call. I'm in a place where I 30% just wanna get over her and get a new girlfriend and just move on with my life but 70% believes she is good for me and I believe I am good for her. Two people don't become as close as we did for no reason.

*abortion - they would'nt let me submit the question with that word in it


Most Helpful Girl

  • Shes confused and maybe the relationship didn't end with closure and that's why she keeps wanting to talk to you. She doesn't want to meet you because she doesn't want to fall for you all over again, or for you to do the same, she's basically saying she doesn't want a relationship. I personally think its a bad idea to be friends with her. its going to end badly. I think its time you guys seperated and took new paths.


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What Girls Said 2

  • In all honesty I think she has'nt.forgiven you for the abortion...i think a part of her loves you,but the Pain is still fresh. I think she thinks being friends would hurt.worse because maybe she loves you and doesn't want to with anyone else either?

  • it sounds a little dysfunctional... which doesn't mean there isn't love.. just that it doesn't seem to work. I would just leave it alone and move on, and if its meant to be you guys will end up together, but for now give it space.


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