What should I do? How do I handle this?

I am in a committed relationship. Over the years I have a few male friends / ex colleagues that I meet for coffee and lunches for catch ups ec.

In the last few months I have developed feelings for one of these friends. I am not sure if he has as well, though I think very strongly he has. We have flirted but never crossed the line.

I want to stop seeing him, but felt it rude of me to just suddenly cut him off. I want to be brutal and cut him off but thought of our many many years of friendship, and common courtesy. On the other hand, I couldn't face him, look him in the eye, tell him my feelings - I can't do this.

I can't email him - his personal assistant has access to his email.

What should I do ! How do I handle this ?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I don't get it.

    To me, if you're flirting outside of your relationship you're crossing the line. If you let yourself develop feelings for a friend you're crossing the line.

    It didn't develop out of nowhere so if you don't want this to happen again you'll have to stop yourself from having thoughts about flirting with other guys and then of course you'd have to refrain from actually doing that. You don't need to cut him out unless you want to respect your boyfriend in that way (remember that this is cutting off the problem at the end and not preventing any future problems of the same nature)... Just stop flirting with this other guy and don't encourage any of his flirting behavior . If you really want to set it straight tell him how you feel about the fact that you shouldn't have been flirting with him in the first place whether you thought it was harmless or not and that you're sorry about it and you wish that he wouldn't do it as well so that you're not crossing the line. You do not need to tell him that you like him.


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • It won't be rude to cut him off...


What Girls Said 1

  • Honestly I agree with Visual. You need to STOP being so flirtatious. Reflect on the various values you share with your current BF. STOP crossing boundaries. You don't really want the guys you flirt with you just like their attention. Remember don't do to your Boyfriend what your don't want him to do to you.Carry yourself like a lady. People will always tempt you more when your in a relationship its up to you to make the right choice. In your heart you know what you need to do.


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