I've been distant friends with this guy for awhile (we never really hung out one on one, so that's why I say distant). He's always been really nice and funny, I've always thought he was a great guy. About a month ago we started dating and I find that there's not too much of a spark (no butterflies) with him, no passion, I don't find myself wanting him. And even when we get physical, I don't feel too turned on by him...sometimes I'm even turned off by the way he touches or kisses me. But I've gotten to know him much more and I have a lot of fun with him, he's easy to talk to and I feel really comfortable with him (and I'm very shy so it's difficult for me to find someone I can talk to freely).
The annoying thing is the guy I was with before him I was extremely attracted too and passionate about but I had trouble connecting with him. I get nervous around him and I can't think or speak.
Is it possible to have both passion and comfort in a relationship?
And I feel I should I end things with the guy I'm currently with. Should I? It feels strange to stay in a relationship with someone who seems more like a friend. And how can I do it with out hurting him and still preserving our friendship, which I think has grown tremendously since we began dating, and I'd like it to continue to do so?
Most Helpful Guy
Yes, that's when you know you have the right one. Being comfortable around the one your passionate about. You just want to be with them all the time. That's when you fall in love with them but it's so hard to find, & some people will end up settling through frustration, loneliness etc cause they never do find that one person they just click with on all levels. Or they do, ƒuck it up & alas! their next relationship is a year with GAG.
I suggest if you don't feel that spark, don't stay because your just settling, all the while you'll be missing opportunities to find the one you are meant to be with. Or if you do, you're going to crush this guy & the friendship.
All you can do is be totally honest with him, it's hard, he's going to be hurt but if he's any kind of friend he'll respect you for it down the road.0