Guys, is it really that fast?

So, was in a relationship 5 years, found out he was cheating broke up 2 months ago, two weeks ago he was blowing up my phone saying he had changed, and wanted me and loved me. I found out at the end of the week he and the girl he cheated on me with got an apartment together. I was hurt and furious.

Background on the guy he's 3 years younger than me, has a drinking problem, gets abusive at times, lies constantly to everyone about stupid things, and had been contacting me every few days since the breakup. 2 months ago but I haven't heard anything since.

So why text me and tell me he wants me and loves me?

I blocked him and his girlfriend because both were texting me after she found out he was texting me. She begged for the proof of the texts, and he switched his tune completely blaming me for everything. Saying I needed to block him because he had no self control. So it was just easier to block them.

I found out this week he blocked me, which pissed me off but I wasn't sure if it was because I blocked him.

I did what everyone say not to and emailed him, for my own closure. It wasn't sappy or whiny just to the point, maybe 3 sentences and ended it with I'm sure we will both be just fine.

I wasn't expecting a response but he replied with "u don't want this"

I replied "I don't want what?"

He said "Me"

So my question is after 5 years and plans being made is it really that easy to get over me?

And why did he email me that? Is he expecting me to fight for him? I'm confused by the email, is that what he was trying to do?


Most Helpful Guy

  • No, it's not really that fast. When a guy really likes someone, we don't get over it that fast. What usually happens though, is that throughout the relationship, our feelings might start to fade over time, but we don't really do anything about it. Slowly, we stop caring, but it's not like we wake up one day and suddenly decide to stop caring. No - it happens slowly. Like over a few months.

    By the time he decided to cheat on you, it was because he no longer cared about you anymore. The fact that after you caught him, he's trying to get back together with you, is just so that he doesn't have to feel bad about it. He knows he hurt you and it's on his conscience, and so he feels like a monster for doing that with you. The only way for him to stop feeling this way, is for you to forgive him. And if you get back with him, he'll consider that as forgiveness, and will stop feeling bad. This DOESN'T mean he'll go back to liking you again though.


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