How to make a girl better at kissing without upsetting her?

I have this girl who is probably going to be my girlfriend. She is really cute and cool and everything, but she comes across as someone who hasn't had a lot of experience with guys. For one thing I felt kind of awkward kissing her cause I always did it with tongue with my last girlfriend and I kind of don't think she knows to do it. Should I bring it up? and how?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Here is the thing.

    So in your question you are saying how to make her better at kissing. See, she has to want to be better at it herself. You can't really make her better. You can help her to become better by coaching her in a nonverbal way which is pretty much by showing her. So maybe you are just expecting too much too soon with this girl. Could be that she is just warming up to you and the idea since it's still pretty earlier on for you two and she doesn't have much experience yet.

    Think the best thing for you to do is try to improve your own kissing skills as well, because hey, there is always room for improvement right.

    Just keep working with her unless she gives you signs that she isn't interested. Maybe she just feels shy or awkward or something.

    And it always goes without saying make sure you brush your teeth really well for her, also take your toothbrush and brush your tongue just in case she doesn't like your breath so much.

    She isn't going to be EXACTLY like your last girlfriend. Maybe you felt like you were a good kisser with your past girl friend but what if you really were not?

    Sometimes you just have to start over and figure out what to do with the new person, don't try to make her act like the last one you had.

    So in short, you could say "Do you want me to show you how to french kiss"?


    That way you give her a chance to say something about how she feels about it. Maybe she will say she doesn't like it, maybe she will say she does like but she doesn't know how..

    Just say it to her in a nice flirtatious way...see what she says in response then go from there.

    Don't tell her she is a bad kisser or that she isn't doing it the way you want her to because it's unromantic and unmanly. Especially since she is inexperienced.

    Do you see where I'm going with all of this.


Recommended Questions

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 6

  • idk its pretty easy t just follow someones lead if uve never kissed their way before.i learnt by the endof the first kiss-id never kissed anyone ever.

    maybe sjes just not doing it because she's uncomfortable. not because she can't get it together,ask her if she's uncomfortable with how you're kissing.

  • show her what you like... or when she does something you like tell her! oh I like when you do that and this and do what you want her to do.

  • Maybe she doesn't like it. Some people don't.

    I would just ask her in general what she wants you to do physically...don't obsess about the kissing.

    Suck her boobs.

  • Just tell her you really like when she does __________. Positive reinforcement is the best way. Don't tell her you don't think she's a great kisser, that will just bring her down and she won't want to kiss you. Also, practice makes perfect. The more you kiss, the more she will learn. Just keep at it and show her the things you like more often. She will start to pick up on them and do it back to you. You should be kissing with fireworks behind you two if you teach her how in a positive way that won't bring her down.

    • Also with french kissing, lick her lip a few times to kind of give her the picture of what you want to do. When she does it back, Lick a little farther inside her lip, and so on

    • would it be bad to flat out say "have you ever tried tongue" or something

    • Not entirely. But go with "Do you want me to show you how to French kiss?"

      Whats-her-bucket above me is right. It's a sexy ass question. I would for sure be up to learn if you asked me like that.

      Asking her to use tongue might make her nervous and think you expect more out of her. No girl wants to come off as a prude. That could just put her on the spot. and that's bad.

  • Make it more about you wanting to make her kissing experience nicer, rather than telling her she doesn't know how. Ask her if there's anything new you haven't done with kissing that she'd like to try, or if things seem awkward the next time you use your tongue, ask her if she's enjoying it or if there's something you can do to make that part if it more pleasant. I still haven't had my first kiss, but I think if a more experienced guy were to say something along those lines, it would make me more comfortable than him saying that I can't kiss well yet.

  • How does anyone get better at anything?



What Guys Said 1

  • NO... Don't say anything, you will ruin the moment! You have to lead the kiss! Kind of like dancing. You lead, she follows, she will follow. More so if you are a good kisser.

    • not really... I kind of tried that already

    • Show All
    • should I say something afterward like "have you ever tried tongue" or something?

    • You can ASK her if you may 'french' kiss her? If she asks 'what's that' then ask her to let you lead the kiss... then do it softly and slowly.. get her used to it... Don't just ram your tongue down her throat! start with soft closed mouth kiss, suck softly on her bottom lip... get passionate! You have to get her to really like that style of kissing if you want this to be successful!

Recommended myTakes