I don't care whether she says yes or not?

I don't know if I've gone emotionally cold or if it's just newfound maturity, but I've gotten to the point where I don't care whether a girl goes out with me or not. If I like her, I'll ask her, but I'm not gonna spend a lot of time trying to convince or interacting with her beforehand.

It's just that I feel like if I want a girl to be my friend, then I'll talk to her a lot, but if I want to date her, then I'm not wasting time talking beforehand, she can get to know me through dating. And if she doesn't want to, then so be it.

It seems to me that this is the attitude guys are always saying other guys should take and it feels like I've really reached that point. I feel like it's better this way because less emotions are involved and I can take it or leave it. However, could I just be getting cold? But is that necessarily bad? It seems better than the alternative, which is getting too invested.


Most Helpful Guy

  • this is the only right approach.

    • I'm even doing it with a girl I'm sort of "friends" with. One of those who flirts a lot. She's finally single now, so I figured I'd ask her out so that, either way, there's an answer: she'll go out with me or she'll say no and stop flirting and I don't have to worry about it anymore. We kind of have a tentative date set, but I haven't bothered talking to her in person since we set the date and I still have to confirm it, so if she blows it off, I don't care and I'm done with her.

    • that's my man.

      you go in like a bull, you get an answer, and you stay in our you go out - looking for another chick.

      getting chicks is a numbers game.

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

What Guys Said 1

  • That's the right approach to when she says no, but if she says yes, you should actually enjoy it, not maintain the whole "I don't care" attitude.