Need a guy decode, my ex is hot and cold with me, can anyone explain this

-We dated for two years

-he broke up with me because he was focused on overachieving with school and never made time for me, something we fought about.

-He texted me a week after saying he still loves me misses me etc once I respond he says its just not going to work etc

-texts me again a couple weeks later to ask if I've slept with anyone

-texts me a couple months later to ask if we can go for coffee and I said I didn't have time before I left to australia

-got back from australia and its now been 4 months he messaged my best friend asking how I was

-i messaged him to get my stuff and go for coffee

- we Did this he was really sweet and bought me dinner explained how he hasn't thought about dating anyone else, but in the same breath he tells me he won't probably date again for 2 years till he's done his degree. said it was good to see me we kissed and cuddled then went our separate ways

-i asked him to hang out again and he just responded "if I don't have homework" so I just never texted him again and he did not text me again.

-While I don't necessarily know if we should be together he is a great guy and I miss him.

-Does anyone know what the heck his behavior means?


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What Guys Said 2

  • He loves you (clearly, with the messaging from time to time) just that he's just too focused on his career at the moment, and maybe he feels if he's too into you (ie spending too much time), he may get distracted and never get it finished. To most aspiring men, his career is most important. If you understand things from his perspective, you will see it will be important to you as well. As ultimately when he completes it it means he'll get better pay to be able to support you and provide a much more stable (and thus happy) future for you both...

    That said, it's a bit of an excuse I feel to break off a relationship - maybe he's just shy or a little flustered by it? If I were him I would still text my girlfriend and see her from time to time even when studying...

    • yeah I understand that he needs to focus on getting himself established. I always supported him in that but it became to where even finding one day a week for me was difficult and we started fighting then he ended it, saying he just couldn't handle a relationship. anyhow he keeps wanting me around but I doubt I will stay single for two years till he's done. I think if I were the right girl for him he would have made it work, I'm just confused by his behavior is all. this helps though thanks!

  • He's missing the most important part of college



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