Chasing a co-worker...

So I'm pretty much crazy about this co-worker of mine, and I'm trying to get a sense of where she stands.

The first month, I thought she was okay, strange, whatever...and then she started growing on me, bigtime. We always had good chemistry, and finally I told her how I felt, and proposed a simple date.

She said she had a boyfriend. However, I think that was just an excuse, for whatever reason. On Chinese Valentine's Day, she went out with a girlfriend of hers, and on the social network we use (in China) - I've never seen any mention of her dude. Nonetheless, after this, I told her I respect her a lot, I hope she is happy, and I think she is a beautiful person.

Being that this girl is so irresistible to me, I've maintained a steady showering of praise and affection. Really simple, cutesy type of stuff, like a random note here and here. Basically telling her how beautiful and special she is. But not overwhelming at all. We don't hang out after work or anything. I've tried asking her for lunch/dinner a few times, but she always has something going on, and tells me to take a rain check.

I'm trying to get a sense of how she feels. Despite the fact she turned me down, she has remained warm to me. She thanks me whenever I give her a compliment. She visits me in my office every now and then to "check on my plants" (she took care of them for a month while I was away recently), or to give me some fruit or snacks or whatever. Otherwise that's about it.

I figure if she was 100% against the idea of dating me, she wouldn't be doing these things, or she'd ignore me outright. So what is my move from here? I think there may be a slight chance, or perhaps I should just give up for good?

Really taken with this girl...


Most Helpful Girl

  • She has turned down all opportunities to go on a date with u. She doesn't like u


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • As hard as it is to hear. She isn't interested. I've had co-workers ask me out as well and I responded in the same manner because I want to maintain a professional relationship.


What Guys Said 1

  • It's perfectly clear she's not interested, sorry buddy :(. That's just how it is sometimes, all you can do is move on and hope the next time you find a girl that you're interested the feelings are mutual. She likes the attention that's why she's still friendly with you.

    Also, just some advice don't share your feelings that much it makes you seem desperate (no offense, just trying to help), leave some mystery, girls love mystery. Another thing, when you ask a girl to go on a date with you, there's no reason to tell her why you're asking and how you feel about her, it's just not confident, it's almost as if you're trying to get a pity date (even though you're not). When someone asks someone else out on a date, it's understood that the said person is interested, no reason to expand on it, leave that for later when it's obvious you two are into each other. Good luck with the next girl!