How to ask her out on a date after we've already hung out twice?

Short story:

She's definitely girlfriend material, I just don't know how to go from her possibly seeing me as a random guy from the internet who so happened to have a spare ticket to see one of her favorite bands; into her seeing me as a potential boyfriend and going on an actual date.

Long story:

There was a girl on craigslist who wanted a ticket to go to an upcoming sold-out concert and someone to go with, thankfully I had a spare ticket and no one to go with.

She is new to the area and probably doesn't have many friends, and neither do I so it was a win-win situation.

She was keen on meeting up before the concert for a chat, walk or coffee, so we emailed then texted back and forth to set up a date/time.

We settled on meeting up for coffee on a Saturday evening about two weeks before the concert.

As anyone might be, I was a bit apprehensive about meeting a stranger from the internet, but when I met her, I wouldn't say it was love at first sight because I don't believe in it, but I was blown away by how cool, cute, adorable she was! There was only a slight language barrier, though she speaks it incredibly well, English isn't her first language.

I've actually never been out for coffee with a female friend before, let alone on a date, but this seriously felt like it was a date. When I went to pay - I ended up paying for both, the cashier possibly thought we were on a date. lol

So more recently, I picked her up and we went to the concert and both had an amazing time.

It was weird though, because, just like the coffee "date", it was like a date but without any of the typical physical stuff like hugging/kissing etc... As mentioned previously, we met over craigslist because she wanted a ticket to see one of her favorite bands and someone to go with, not a see one of her favorite bands and call it a date.

At the end of the night when I dropped her home I really wanted to hug/kiss her, but didn't want to ruin any connection so far established or come across creepy because of the fact it wasn't a date per-se.

I told her how much I had enjoyed the night, especially as she had been there too, and that I'd like to see her again some time.. she also said how much she loved the concert and to text her if I wanted to hang out again to which I said I would. I said how much it had felt like a date - to which she just exclaimed "jesus" and we both laughed, then said our goodbyes..

So my question for you is:

What is the best way I can ask her out on a "date" and not simply to hang out like we're friends?


Most Helpful Guy

  • This sound like my situation when I first started talking to my girlfriend. We also went to a coffee hangout (date). I wasn't sure if she like me. Then I ask her out to dinner which she agreed. Yeah don't try to pull any kiss on the first date. Like the other poster said, don't tell her its a date. You will definitely make her feel uncomfortable. If she likes you she will agreed. Why bother wasting hours with someone you don't like right?

    • thanks for the reply! as mentioned, I've already been out with her twice (coffee 1st time, concert 2nd time). So you reckon I shouldn't pull a kiss on her the next (3rd) time I see her? Any ideas on what to do / where to ask her out to? thanks man.

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What Girls Said 1

  • you don't have to tell her it's a date or not , it might scare her away. why not just hang out, get to know her better, flirting, make her likes you... when two people likes each other hang out it becomes a date

    • thanks for the reply! good advice.

What Guys Said 1

  • Hey how about inviting her over to your house for a movie? That's what I did. I kiss her on the 4th day. You don't want to wait to long to kiss her. Always try to make a move. Try holding her hands then pull her closer and see how she reacts.

    • I live with relatives.. I was thinking of asking her out to watch a movie, but it doesn't really allow for much talking. Maybe a movie and dinner. I'm just nervous that I'm gonna be awkward. I guess there's always a first for everything, but it just makes it worse that I'm 23 and never hugged or kissed a girl.

    • Maybe a walk at the part is better. That gives you more time to talk to each other. You can't really talk when your watching a movie at the theater. Dinner also makes you more nervous. Save that for later on. Walking in the park allow both of you to be more comfortable. Hope this helps.