LADIES, Am I friend zoned?

So she used to like me, I didn't. It's been 6 months. I'm getting feelings for her. We are like best friends now. I don't think she likes me that way because she teases me about other girls and told me she was worried about being on kiss cam with me at a Lakers game and she wouldn't kiss me but maybe the stranger next to me because it would be less weird. My friend also told her I liked her about a month ago, she said "no umm idk" and nothing really happened. But recently we got really close. One night , after a deep conversation, she pulled me really close to her face and we just stared at each other. did she want a kiss? I didn't know what to do. We then cuddled on the couch. Am I just her friend zoned cuddle buddy? When we cuddled, it wasn't just sleep next to each other, she subtly felt my chest and abs, outside my shirt. What do you think? Do really good friends do that? When I stuck my face close to hers to see if she was going to give me another opportunity, she just kept her eyes close and face down on my chest. She will be moving in soon cause she needs a roommate. will this further ruin my chances?


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  • It's hard to say where you stand, but from what you're telling me, I think you need to tell her exactly how you feel before things get awkward. I think you should tell her how you feel about her YOURSELF, and then make it clear you want to know where you two stand. Normally I don't suggest something like this, but if she's moving in, you need to sort this stuff out NOW, or forget about your feelings for her, otherwise things will only get awkward as all hell. In fact you might want to tell her that if she tries to dodge your question.

    Personally though, I think there is pretty good chance she's just been screwing with you. That whole "No um, I don't know" crap sounds uncomfortably close to "I'm so confused" to me. In which case she's screwing with you. It's just far enough out to make me question it. So, put your cards on the table, get an answer, and even if it's a solid no, then that's OK. At least then you know where you stand, there's no more jerking around, and you have enough closure to move on. Just don't ask stupid questions like "why not?" because that will bring it right back to uncomfortable again. Whatever answer you get, accept it. After all, she's going to be your roommate.

    • how do I word it without risking our friendship? she said umm no to my friend, I think this may be because he is my best friend and she knows if he knows I will know.

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    • I don't know. Just make sure she knows that this is important, that yes you're serious. Yes you need an answer now (or before she moves in), but that she doesn't have to worry too much about this, because you can take whatever answer she gives. That if she doesn't feel the same way, you're not going to flip out. You're not going to whine at her or constantly wonder "why not". You're just going to take it as what it is.

    • (And by the way, you WILL NEED to hold up to that.)

      Still, with all that said you make sure she knows that you are asking her all this, just to get it out of the way. To relieve all tension, and set things straight, so things don't get weird or complicated, and so you can be roomies without all that crap.

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