Should I contact him or am I being rejected?

So here it goes: I was communicating with a guy via email on a dating website that I was very interested in.

-We talked on the phone 1st time 26 Dec- great conversation. Asked me on a date for Friday (28).

-27th- cancels date for the 28 because he is sick (I heard him on the phone and he really was sick)

-28- he calls me and we talk for a while. I may have said some things that turned him off but not sure!

30- I text him to ask how he's feeling. maybe he didn't understand my sense of humor in text. we text back and forth.

Today: Jan 4- still have not heard from him- no text, no call, nothing. I know he was still very sick on the 30th so maybe he is not over it, I don't know. I really liked this guy and want to keep communicating with him. However, I initiated the last contact on the 30th and am weary to do so again.

So, what should I do? I was thinking of texting him either: "hi, how are you feeling?" or "i hope there isn't somehting I said that was off-putting" (something like that)


should I just wait for him to contact me


assume this is it for us?

*On Sunday it will have been a week since we have talked.


Most Helpful Guy

  • If a guy likes a girl, even slightly, he'll go out of his way to let her know... and if he has your number he'll use it. The fact that he hasn't is a clear indication that he's not really interested.

    Once an impression is made it's over.

    Your best bet is to NOT contact him and to start putting your efforts towards someone else worthy of your attention... don't waste any further efforts on Mr. Not Interested... it's only going to erode your self esteem and confidence.

    There are plenty of men looking to meet a great girl, so go give them a chance now. :)

    ~ Robby


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 6

  • You should feel to contact him, but being a online dating veteran it does sound like he's not into you (sorry). If a guy likes a girl he will text, call, or email as much as he can. He could be playing hard to get but if he is than he's probably not someone you should pursue.

    I would definitely text him a "how are you feeling", but be prepared if he doesn't text you back.

    My initial reaction is that he either met someone else or is just not really into you and doesn't know how to tell you

  • I am not sure what to tell you say to him...

    However, my thought is that if you like him, what does it hurt to try one more time. The worst he is going to do is tell you he isn't interested or just not reply. The best... well who knows?

    Maybe you could say something like "I hope your New Year is going well so far. I would love to chat again if you would."

    This basically leaves the ball in his court...

    I wish you well...

  • After 4 days it is OK to communicate again. I would call him personally to see how he is feeling. Comes off more strong..If no answer, leave a short message and ask him to give you a call when he is up to it.

    Nothing about is it something you said...just keep it simple.

    If he does not communicate back for 3 days...forgetboutit!... His loss...

    Good luck

  • Just check up on him. ask a question though, because if it's a statement then people are a lot less likely to respond(which is rude). Asking if he is still sick would be perfect, I guess...

  • Hmmm, I'd say wait and let him make the next move. If he doesn't, then I guess he's just not that interested and you should just move on.

    But if you're really desperate, just one LAST text. No more.

  • just text him and see if he's still sick.


What Girls Said 1

  • Wait for him to contact you. He canceled the date, didn't reschedule, and you made last contact. No need to ask if you said anything off-putting, it will come across as insecurity. Confidence will make you look more attractive at this point. And there's no point in trying to get the right answer "Is this it, or not?" Treat it like you should be treating it, things aren't progressing with a guy you haven't even been on a date with. No harm, no foul, don't get so invested in someone you hardly know or take it personally.

    Instead of thinking, "Oh no, I said something wrong and I need to fix it," think, "Hey this guy bailed on a date and hasn't been a very good communicator. I'm not sure this is a guy I'd want to date, but since I hardly know him, I'm not going to give this a second thought." He's not worth stressing over, good or bad. The whole point of a dating site is to meet people and see who would be a good fit. He's not demonstrating that he's a good fit, so don't try to force it to be one. When you appear confident and relaxed like this, guys will see you as a catch.

Loading... ;