I'm a bit overwhelmed with dating and everything that comes with it

I've never really dated before but then I tried online dating and I got a fairly positive response. I've been on a few days, on a lot of them actually. I went on 10 dates with 8 different guys in the past 3 weeks.

I always really wanted a boyfriend but now it just seems scary. The thought of kissing and having sex just kinda freaks me out now. Is that normal?

I also have to reject some of them at some point and I'm just really bad at that. How do people do that?

Now most of the guys are a bit older (25 -30) I'm 20 and while I personally don't mind if it works but how do I explain this to my parents?

I know it sounds a bit stupid but what my parents think matters to me and I don't want them to think the wrong thing


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  • It is normal, I think most girl starts out a little scared, most of us start dating a bit younger, like in school and such with both dating and sex, which is probably why you notice girls your age and think they have it easier.

    It doesn't really start that way, You just need to do it, honestly the initial dating (and your first time having sex) is kinda just something you need to do to get over it, it's not really something you can get over before then, obviously I'm not saying just go out and find some random person, it has to "feel right" and be the right guy, just don't worry about it, it's a really common feeling when you first seriously start dating.

    And the whole you being 20 and them being 25-30 isn't that big of a deal at all, statistics show that women go for older men far more than they do younger or guys who are equal age and men go for younger girls, so that's very normal as well.

    Best of luck.

    • I don't know I feel I'm just kinda in between. I'm seeing none of them long enough to get comfortable or intimate and at the same I know they're expect it someday. And I feel guys older than me will have less patience with stuff like that. And no matter what statistics say if I tell my parents that my boyfriend is 28 or 20 they're gonna be like "what?"

    • I believe parents should just take some time to adjust themselves to the new situation, especially if you live at home. It doesn't matter much how old your boyfriend is.. if it's not the age, it's something else (like for instance: he smokes or whatever). It's your choice, not theirs. They have to accept the choice that makes you happy and you shouldn't think much about whether they will approve, I think.

    • Well, your parents are your parents, but they don't run your life, if you find someone you like and he happens to be 28, well then that's just the way it is.

      And nah, trust me, older guys are far more patience then younger guys, younger guys are trying to get into your pants all the time...older guys are more likely to have had that "overly sexed" younger age and are more looking for someone to enjoy each others company, rather than just a cheap thrill.

  • I'm overwhelmed too, you're not alone on this :)

    Just keep in mind that you're allowed to make mistakes and you learn from them. You can do whatever you want and don't feel bad about letting some guys down.

    Good luck!

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