I know I'm clingy. Can anyone give me tips on how to be cool around him?

So I really like this guy and I don't see him very often. So I text him all the time but he is alway the first to say he has to gO and he never texts me first. I feel like I am really clingy because I like him so much but how can I be cool and calm but still get him to chase me too?


Most Helpful Guy

  • okay no to below me. It is not a competition, or at least shouldn't be, of who can end the conversation first. That is very childish. Personally, I absolutely hate texting unless it is just a quick question. Texting at least doubles the amount of time it takes to have a conversation. I can't "talk" to someone I like through texts, also people will text things that they would never vocalize. So maybe he is like me and doesn't like texting. Also, are you actually conversing about SOMETHING? or are you trying to hang out through texts?

    • It is kinda like hanging out through text

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    • That makes sense. How do I hold his attention? What are some things I can say?

    • Don't only talk about things they like or you like. I would not want to talk to somebody I barely knew if they just told me about "say yes to the dress" and such(damn ex wife) haha. If something funny happens in your day, tell him about it. But don't expect him to say things if you have nothing to say as well. And if you never have anything in common to talk about, then you probably have no business trying to be with that person.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Find out what he likes, what drives him - maybe there's something in common you can both chase or something you can possess that he wants to play with


What Girls Said 2

  • Don't text him as much. Don't make him a priority in your life (yet). But if he doesn't like you in the same way, there's not gonna be much chasing.

    • Is there anything I can do to help that happen?

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    • Ok thanks :)

    • You're welcome :)

      Best thing is to try to take your mind off of him and keep busy :)

  • So we'll start with the basics. Here's the definition of "CLINGY" link

    When you like somebody it's hard not to fall into this category because you DO want to spend a lot of time with them... HOWEVER:

    You essentially have to turn the tables on him

    (1) Keep conversations under five minutes and ALWAYS be the first to go. Some people actually set a timer.

    (2) Don't answer every single text, no matter what. If you have more than three texts, that's the basis for a PHONE CONVERSATION, so just call each other later. In my book, one call is better 50 texts.

    (3) Stop checking your phone every two seconds. In fact, turn it off for a while and think of something completely different.

    (4) Throw the bulk of your energy into something else. A dance or exercise class, volunteer activities that will keep your hands and mind busy, etc.

    (5) If none of this works, DELETE HIM from your contacts list and wait for him to contact you. If he doesn't, you essentially know that you were being too clingy. If he does, you know that you've successfully turned the tables.

    • Ok so I went 4 days without texting him and he never responded so I texted him. I kept it at 10 messages and then said I had to go. Is that ok?

    • 10 messages in one shot? That's a lot...

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