Boyfriend issues- what should I do?

So my boyfriend and I have been together for 3 months now. And I've told him several times that I just want at least one text from him a day. Like, I don't care if he needs a day to just himself but 30 seconds to send me a quick text to let me know that- I don't feel like is all that difficult.

But even still after I've told him twice now he won't text me all day. Yeah, yeah, just text him first bla bla bla. That's not the point any more. I'm just kind of feeling unimportant and like he doesn't really care all that much, I don't want to be the one to text or call him all the time because I don't want to annoy him. But he never really invites me over I always invite myself and I don't want to impose on his space even though he says I can come over any time I want.

I just don't know how to get my point across that I hate when he does this. That I just want to feel like he's thinking about me and takes 30 seconds to send me a text.


Most Helpful Guy

  • People sure are different in their emotional needs. Your guy just doesn't get you. Think of plants and their biological needs. You can place a cactus in the poorest soil with little water blasting wind and blazing sun and ignore it and it does just fine. But the orchid needs a controlled greenhouse atmosphere with evenly moist rich soil and filtered sunlight, plenty of humidity and no harsh wind. Your guy is treating you like a cactus when you're in need of more emotional nourishment.

    • Ugh, this. All this and more.

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What Guys Said 2

  • I love people that complain about not having a conversation but refuse to actually start a conversation. Why don't you just text him "Hope you're having a good day!"? Then he'll text you back "You too sweetie." I mean why is that so difficult?

    It sounds like you two are not compatible in terms of relationship styles at this point in your respective lives. You might not be a good fit right now. Doesn't mean you both can't find someone else that would be better, it just means that you two probably aren't the best right now to be in a relationship together.

    I expect you'll hate hearing that, but most teenagers do.

    • That's funny because I'm not a teenager.But thank you for your assumption. I understand this sounds a little childish but the point is that I want to see that he cares. Showing is better than telling

    • You're right. And it seems he is either not showing it, or showing it in a different way. That's that. It is now your move to accept it or to move on. I just assumed you were a teenager but you could be 20 or 21 and that isn't that different. I just meant the maturity of the situation is one that you won't find after people have grown up and dated and can discuss different styles, etc.

  • If you're getting uncomfortable with his actions, you're better off without him in your life.


What Girls Said 1

  • He doesn't care that much. I hope you don't give in to him sexually very often. He has to work for it. In terms of affection. He's got it too easy with you.

    • While witholding sex may be satisfying for a woman emotionally starving it ultimately will be toxic to the relationship.

      Men are stupid. Women are crazy. And women are crazy BECAUSE men are stupid. This guy doesn't seem to have the skills to adequately meet her emotional needs.

    • withholding sex to see if he gets a clue, they are young, maybe he thinks women just come over to kiss and have sex and has no need for their emotional attention. Withholding then if doesn't respond, she should be out of there. Not withholding as a game.

    • He doesn't care that much? How can you say that. Ridiculous. He could just be showing it in a far different way. It seems to her that he doesn't care that much. Can't say if he does or doesn't, but if they aren't a good fit in terms of discussing things like this and moving forward, they'll need to find different partners.