Boyfriend knows I'm sick and still stands me up! WTH?

I got one of those 48 hours viruses. Basically, a nasty headache (I never get headaches so when I have one I can't even see straight) and horrible muscle and stomach pain.

Yesterday I got home at 5pm and went straight to bed. I texted my 29yo boyfriend, he said he was worried and he'd just get a snack and stop by. I waited until 12am, when he texted that he was very sorry, but he had fallen asleep. I was angry, but it was his first day of work after vacation, so I understood. We agreed to meet this morning. We met and he was very caring, nice, sweet as usual.

By 11am I felt sick again. I was supposed to go to college, but he said I should stay home and rest and that he'd stop by around 3pm. At 4 I texted him if he was still coming over. It's 11pm and no news from him. He was even supposed to have dinner at my place.

I'm not dying, but it'd be nice if he could stay with me, even for an hour.

I feel better now, but I've a teenager-ish urge of pretending I'm worse just to make him feel bad about not showing up.


How should I deal with this? He looks very concerned by text and in person, but then he just stands me up.. Should I make a scene and act angry or just tell him I am disappointed because he left me sick and alone TWICE?

I thought about texting him "I should have gone to college, I'd still feel like crap, but at least I wouldn't be alone", but I think that is too agressive?


Most Helpful Girl

  • My ex boyfriend was like this. Don't text him, pre-occupy yourself by texting a friend instead, or watching a movie.

    If he cares, he will text. Let him be the one to sweat. Why are you having to work so hard to be in his life, when he should want to be in your life. You are the one who is sick after all. If he is truly concerned he will be there and he will want to know you are okay.

    I say rest up, you are sick and need your rest. When he resurfaces, let him be the one to initiate the contact. Don't let him have all the power in this relationship.

    This might seem like game playing, but honestly if you work yourself up about this guy you are only giving into this power trip.

    I would definitely reconsider this relationship if his lack of attention towards you is a regular occurrence. As his partner, you deserve to have your boyfriend care and have concern for you. He shouldn't be taking you for granted.

    My ex boyfriend did this to me and now I see why we didn't work out. Don't make the same mistake I made by standing by his side and making excuses. My boyfriend would tell me he was coming to my house at 12 (for lunch) and then not show up until 10 pm, if even! No call or anything! It's incredibly disrespectful to you and your guy's relationship to treat you this way. Don't put up with it.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • You should confront him about it and demand for an explanation.

    It's really bad that he's standing you up. Don't make a scene.

    Just ask for an explanation. Perhaps, things are kind of like an "emergency" for him so he set out to follow his priorities first.

  • how far you two live?

    • 10 minutes away by subway.

What Girls Said 0

The only opinion from girls was selected the Most Helpful Opinion, but you can still contribute by sharing an opinion!

Loading... ;