This is long...but I could really use your input. What would you do?

This is a long one and for those of you who will read this, thank you. I am at a complete loss and don't know what to do. To begin I met Adam through my job. We both work for different companies but we both travel 7 months of the year to the same areas selling our products at conventions and meetings.

I met adam through a friend and he was automatically very sweet to me. We have personalities that mesh very well and we have both noted that many times. Within the first few months of us meeting, I found myself falling for him and couldn't help but think that he was falling for me too. We would travel all over the place together, just the two of us. We would go to the beach or on walks or just go sighting seeing and drive around and talk about the future and what we both want; most of the time it lined up and we would talk about how we both want to get married and have families.

We would stay up until all hours of the morning just talking and discuss our dreams and our goals. He has said to me MANY times how comfortable he is with me and how he feels like he opens up to me in a way he can't do with most people.

When we first started hanging out, he was dating a girl (Laura) who things quickly ended with (about a month after we started spending time together) because he said she was upset about our friendship. Of course that made me VERY happy.

The issue was, despite spending every moment of three months together, he never made a move. EVER. Nothing ever happened. We would discuss how we wanted to date someone who is a friend...he would always say he wants to date someone he connects with and is friends with. On several other occasions he has made comments about how he does find me attractive...he didn't do it very often, but never the less it happened.

The summer came and we spoke a few times a month on the phone since we weren't seeing each other as much. I was tired of waiting and decided to try my hand at dating other people...I told him about it and would talk about it, but I just was never satisfied. I cared about Adam in a way that I never cared about anyone.

Adam lives five hours away from me and doesn't have a car since he lives in a city. He has asked me on several occasions if I would ever consider moving to his city for work.

It has been about a month since we last spoke and he hasn't dated anyone. I have just recently accepted a new job in which I will not see him. I have been thinking of him a lot recently. I honestly feel like if we were to date ever, I could see myself spending the rest of my life with him.

Does it seem worth it to tell him? I am 25 years old and honestly, I usually play it safe. I never want to tell someone how I feel in fear of jeopardizing a friendship. If I do tell him, what should I say and do I do it on the phone or via e-mail? I am scared because I have never felt this way before, but I als o have never done anything like this before. Please advise.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Do it on the phone. "Better to try and fail than to fail to try." (I don't know who said this) You don't want to lose this chance. Give it a shot before it is too late. Do this for love.

    He didn't make a move because either he was shy, or, as he was hinting at what he was looking for in a relationship, he hoped that you would like him. He may not have known that you liked him, and so he didn't want to jeopardize the friendship by making a move. Tell him your true feelings. If you do it over email it isn't personal enough. Hear his voice,etc.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Please do not keep this to yourself. You have to let him know how you feel. Face to face if possible. If you do not do it, you will regret it later on in life and always wonder.


What Girls Said 1

  • I think you should tell him how you feel. You're always gonna wonder about him and it sounds like you feel very strongly. He also seems like a good man. Not like the type to go off and cheat. He's respectable and I think he's been giving you plenty of hints. You need to talk to him about it as soon as possible and then the two of you can figure out how to make things works.

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