Could you date a girl who had dated your best mate?

I met this guy on a dating website and went on a couple of dates with him, on the second I slept with him (I regretted it from the moment afterwards) It turns out he was only interested in one thing. Since then I have met his best mate, we arranged a date and a couple of days before I found out they knew each other because his mate (the first guy) text me. We met the day before our date and the following day and had a great time. He did confront me, but I didn't want to talk about it, I didn't tell him because I didn't want to put him off but would have it if went further. We did speak a little, he said it was weird but not too much of a big deal, and with time it would get better. Last night he text about meeting again, text later and rang but I missed the call so I called him back and he was engaged then I replied by text. I hadn't heard back so text this morning suggesting dinner but I still haven't heard and don't think it looks good. What should I do? Should I lay my cards on the table and say I know we are in a weird situation but we've had a great couple of first dates, get one well and think we could have more good times together and it could develop. I didn't want to talk about it on our date but if he wants to he can give me a call, if not I'll give him a few days to think about it but its his decision, hopefully we'll meet up at the weekend but the ball is in his court?

Also, he wanted sex on the second date but I held off, I told him I wanted him to respect me and I wanted to respect myself. They are also both in the forces.

Please help me, for the first time in ages I have felt like I've met a good match and I feel like I've lost something which could have gone somewhere.

Just to clarify I am not speaking to guy one anymore, he text me saying "hahaha ringing my best mate lol" I didn't reply and since then I have deleted his contact details.

It was guy 2 who confronted me about it on our second date.


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What Guys Said 1

  • If the first guy is engaged, I'm sure there's nothing wrong with you dating his friend. The first guy has obviously moved on.

    Yes, you should put your cards on the table. I think your plan is good so far.

    • The first guy isn't engaged, he was a player which I didn't know until afterward. Do you think guy 2 could be playing me? Why did he ask me about meeting again and call but not respond to my texts?

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    • Also, it could actually be that I dented his ego by turning him down but not his friend, but I really like him and he told me he really liked me so I thought we could wait. I want him to respect me and I want to respect myself. I'm sick of ending up as somebody's notch on their bed post.

    • I understand that. Maybe look at the type of guys you are attracted to, and see if you can improve your choices. Don't 'give it up' so easily. Best luck.

What Girls Said 1

  • Seriously, you have a lot going on. just being honest. lol. Respectfully, You crossed the line by dating this guy's friend whether he was cool, cute, or not. Unless you all are in a mutual sexual agreement like some of today's three-way relationships. Then you don't need to play like that, because in the end you will lose! Hope I've been a helper and not an offender.

    • I didn't know they were friends, I met them both on a mutal dating site. I would be civilised but don't want to have anything to do with his friend.