People seem never to be completely fixed on this topic in terms of agreeing, Is jealousy necessary for relationships & Dating?
I think it's not great for relationships because it creates tension and uneasiness among two people who are supposed to get along, but that's my opinion.
What do you think?
- Yeah, it can be healthy.Vote A
- No, it's unhealthy.Vote B
Most Helpful Girl
It's healthy only in small doses, hahaha. :)
I have heard people say that "A healthy relationship should have no jealousy" or that "Jealousy will sure damage any relationship", but I don't think it's all black and white. In my opinion, there are two types of jealousy: healthy jealousy and unhealthy jealousy.
Jealousy is like any other emotion that we experience: Fear, Worry, Happiness, etc...We can consider it a healthy feeling if it gives us a warning signal which protects us from danger or it can be unhealthy when we use it for destructive purposes. So, we can't really blame the emotion. Humans are the one to blame for how we use such emotions.
Unhealthy jealousy is a feeling that's accompanied by anxiety, fear and anger. So, it's a fear-based type of emotion. It can be due to insecurity or some baggage that people carry from past relationships. It can also be due to a personality disorder (such as narcissism, passive aggressive, etc...) that makes one loop into negative emotions as a reaction to feeling jealous which in turn be damaging to relationships.
It's natural to feel jealous over your partner, but how do you react is key. Do you fight like forever because you saw her talking to a male friend? Do you hit your boyfriend because you saw him talking to a girl on phone? OR do you trust them and ask them politely to tell you who those people are and that's it. Again, it's all about how you react to jealousy. Is it a destructive reaction? If yes, then it's unhealthy jealousy.
Healthy jealousy is protective-based feeling. It's same as "parental jealousy". Parents love their kids, care for their emotional well being and whatnot. As kids, when our parents see us talking to strangers or getting too much involved with other people, they feel "parental jealousy" which is a warning signal that's something wrong is happening. They want to protect us from danger and they act upon such feeling.
Same happens with relationships, when you see your girl talking with a guy from work...you feel jealous because you feel protective over her and you want to protect your relationship from any intruder who may cause damage. This is a normal feeling. Healthy jealousy is that concerned, protective feeling that surrounds both parties in the relationship. Healthy jealousy guards and supports a relationship.
It's also great to feel jealous because it gives you a warning signal. It can be an alarm to let you know that something needs attention in your relationship. It can help make your relationship stronger. :) Again, it depends on how you deal with the jealousy you feel inside.
That's how I think of healthy and unhealthy jealousy. :)4
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