New guy is hot and cold... playing games or not interested? Should I forget about him?

I met a guy online about a month ago who initially came on really strong. He wrote me long messages about really personal stuff right off the bat and it seemed weird to me but he was sweet so I went with it. After chatting that first day he gave me his number and we texted back and forth that night till I went to bed. He was really flirty and complimented me a bunch. He ended up asking me what I wanted to do that weekend and implied he wanted to spend the whole weekend hanging out but I shut that down real quick cause it was just too much too fast! I suggested meeting on Saturday and seeing how that went and he seemed okay with that.

The weekend rolled around and he hadn't made concrete plans at all which I thought was weird, but we then ended up meeting that afternoon after I asked if he still wanted to meet up. I had a hard time reading whether he liked me or not but chalked it up to nerves and shyness since he seemed way more forward online/over text. He made it clear he wanted to see me again as we were saying bye though (after we had talked a few hours) and texted me right after saying how he had a good time and then asked me to see a movie right after that. I was happy he didn't seem to do the dumb 3 day rule or anything and just went with it when he knew he wanted to see me again. He texted me all week and then finally on Friday he asked if I could go see it with him that night since he was unexpectedly going out of town for a family issue the next day for about a week. We got together and I was surprised because he didn't try to make a move at all, but I then decided I was impressed because he just seemed really respectful and maybe he still felt shy. We ended up going to a diner after and talking another couple of hours and he told me some really personal things. We hugged goodbye and he texted me after saying he had a good time and that next time we should hang out earlier in the day. I agreed that that sounded good and wished him a safe flight, and asked him to let me know how things were going at home since I knew it wouldn't probably be too easy on him.

I didn't hear from him that whole week while he was away. I ended up texting asking if he was back and how he was doing after giving him a couple more days. He responded but it seemed like he was acting different and wasn't as chatty. I asked how his trip went and didn't even receive a reply, so I assumed he decided it was over and I shrugged and moved on. BUT then he texted me 3 days later asking, "what's up?" which I wasn't expecting. we've texted back and forth a few times after that but nothing like before. Is this guy just bored now or what? I don't get why he'd start up texting me again if he weren't interested at all, but it's just strange cause before the trip he acted way more into me. he claims he's been a little sick but I don't think that would change his whole personality for 2 weeks.. and I don't want to drag this on if he has no interest at all.


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What Guys Said 1

  • Tough to say. Tough to say ...

    Young man floods information and affection and then hits his own baseline so what you're experiencing now is possibly the normal state of his behaviors and the early behaviors were hyperactive behaviors.

    I would ... maybe let it be. Stability is a good trait so if you don't know what his baseline is you might be in trouble. Then again it's only been a month. Too quick. too quick...


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