Am I going about dating all wrong?

I only become attracted to girls I naturally meet and get to know. I don't go out of my way to ask a specific girl out, I don't practice my dating "game" and I don't seek out a girlfriend. I thought this would be a good thing, but here I am, 20 years old, and I've never had a girlfriend, sex, or a first kiss (didn't really want to admit that last one).

Now, another question, is it reasonable or worth my time to look for a girl that has the same lack of experience as I do? Because whenever I have a chance with a girl, I try my best to make something happen, but they always get bored and move on before I figure out exactly what to do. That or they figure I'm not interested, which is never the case. Apparently I unintentionally misrepresent myself, because people (not just girls) seem to think I'm no stranger to the world of women, even though I am. I'm at a loss as to what to do. And I don't really want to try online dating. It's not like I hate being single and am desperate for a girlfriend, I just think it's something worth experiencing, at least to some extent, before I'm 21. Which doesn't look likely at this point.

One more thing. What's with girls that have boyfriends, being interested in me? I'd say at least 80% of the girls in my life that have shown interest in me were dating someone at the time, with no intention of breaking up with them on their own, no matter how unhappy they were with them. Am I one of those guys that girls just see as flirtation material? Because on those few occasions where their relationship came to an end and I made a move (after waiting a month or two, and after determining the interest was still there) they weren't interested. I don't know if there's something wrong with me or what. Need some kind of advice before I give up entirely.


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What Girls Said 1

  • Ok, nothing is wrong with you but you are defenitely taking this out of paportiion. You sound like you have part of it down with just playing the cool card but is little safe. It's fine that you don't just run up to a girl and ask her out but you should try it sometime. You will get reject some of the time but you are practicing how to ask out a girl to see what works and you will gain more confidence from that. If you do approach a female start off by asking what time it is and then complement something about her. If you see her again try to make small talk and then see if she wants to grab a cup of coffee or something depending on what is close by. NEVER present yourself as a lost or needy puppy. Such a turn off. When a guy gives a girl all his attention she will eventually take advantage of you.

    My questions: What do you mean by "make a move?" Be more specific.

    What exactly do you want to experience? Is it that you feel you're not manly enough since you haven't had sex? If so don't be. What did you want to do before 21 that you can't do after 21?

    Things to think about: Why are you making yourself the backup guy by waiting around while these girls have bf's.


What Guys Said 1

  • No, you're not doing anything wrong.