How do I stop "losing myself" when I'm dating a guy?

I've realized that I tend to lose myself when I'm dating a guy. I do a lot of compromising. I'm scared to say no because I think he will be mad at me. I become damn near obsessed with pleasing him in bed and don't know how to get him to please me back. Everything ultimately becomes what he wants and I forget all about me and what I want. I think the problem is I develop these crazy sexual and emotional feelings for them that it becomes easier to do what he wants even if I had previoulsy suggested something else. How can I stop losing myself and how do I stop catching feelings so fast?


Most Helpful Guy

  • It sounds like a one-sided relationship when only you're interested but the other side just tags along because it's convenient to them

    It takes two

    So many people forget it... so much misery could be spared - it takes two to make it work - only one is never enough!

    Measure his interest, hold back for a while.. don't cancel your stuff for him, don't be afraid to say "No" after being asked for some favours when it's clearly inconvenient to you and don't be afraid to disagree with him when your genuine opinions don't match... even if he goes away - you're better off without such selfish scum, if he will stay.. he is interested.. and you won't have such panic fear of "doing something wrong" anymore - relationships when you're supposed to walk on eggshells SUCK


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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 1

  • This sounds horrible but get a friend with benefits or casually date someone that you're not really invested in and just get used to doing things without caring if they'll stop liking you.

    It's like practise dating,

    • Thanks. You sound like me a couple months ago. I did exactly that with the casual dating a guy I was not into and I did not care if he contact me or none of those stuff. I did not lose myself. I had all the power. but the moment I met a guy who I was physically and sexually attracted to it was the same issue I had with "losing myself"