Why can't people accept and respect others' preference in dating, then start to play the race card?

I live in a country where I am considered as the minority (I am biracial).I hear how much the guys in my country prefer this and that type of girls and it used to bother me because I felt like I was excluded.They never mentioned my ethnic.However,I don't care about it now because I have been told that I am cute and I get hit on a lot too.Ironically when I was on this dating site and I stated my preferences,I got some bitter and angry guys who insulted me for not include them in my preference.They even play the race card and call me racist bitch.I am surprise with these jerks who think they can choose what they want but not letting others to choose what we want.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Well, firstly, you are making the assumption that these men are those who "choose what they want but not letting others to choose what we want".

    To answer your question, people tend to have this idea of what ever they do is justified, but for others; no. Think of it as 'I'm an exception to this rule' mentality.

    I also find it interesting that it doesn't bother you anymore because you had to have compliments in order for you to feel better about yourself.

    Another thing is that men are annoyed when women want a certain sort of man they don't fit. In society today, they feel that they are seen to be sexist if they favor a certain type of women but with females, it is encouraged by society to carefully filter out the jerks from the good, respectful-to-women man. Unfortunately, this has created under-the-surface misogyny and feel the are wronged for huge "double-standard".


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What Guys Said 1

  • Because they were hurt that they didn't make your cut. They would rather try and shame you into their dating pool than to accept that they can't have any woman they want.


What Girls Said 1

  • Race is a sensitive topic

    Not to mention, some people can be rude about stating their preferences...

    A lot of guys dislike black women in terms of dating, but they don't simply say they dislike black women, they go on and on about every single feature they hate and they'll generalize black women as ghetto, loud, stupid, dumb, etc.

    it's one thing to say "I prefer XYZ" but it's another to go out of your way to get your point across.

    Either way, people on dating sites tend to have issues so I wouldn't look too much into it