I met this guy online a month ago. I really like him. He seems so into me! He claimed to be honest and not a player. Well, I have serious trust issues. We have not agreed to be exclusive. However, I seen he is still online on the dating site all the time. Well, after we started having sex. It was driving me crazy wondering if I was just being used. So I created a fake profile. I know that is very shady and wrong. He took the bait and emailed her (fake me). So I know he is still trying to date other people. I ask him a few days ago about spending the weekend together. Just by his response I knew something was up. Said he may have to help his friend but if he didn't he would be happy to. Well, last night he told me that he was going to have to help his friend but we can hang out Fri. I have a feeling he's got a date. I told him I'd let him know today. Well, I finally decided to ask him if was seeing anyone else. So, I text him and he responded with a joke. In the meantime, he had also emailed my fake profile saying he was going to be in her neighborhood working today.
I know we are not exclusive and I can't tell him what I know without looking like a stalker. So, if he lies and says he isn't. Do I just stop talking to him or what? I understand if he wants to date other people but I am not having sex with a guy that is possibly having sex with other women. That's wrong on so many levels.
Most Helpful Girl
If YOU CHOOSE to have sex with a guy…. When the relationship hasn’t been made exclusive then you need to have sex with that guy assuming he is probably having sex with others. (Obviously take precautions and be careful) If you are NOT OK with that… then you shouldn’t have sex with him until you are exclusive.
The BIGGEST rule I live by is…. DON’T ask questions you can’t handle the answer too!
It doesn’t sound like he lied about anything. You said when you called him out on it.. he made a joke.. so he didn’t lie, he just skirted around it. Which yes, is a form of lying but YOU pretending to be a totally different person, now THAT is lying.. BIG TIME! On the other hand if he would of said “Yea, I am dating and sleeping with 3 of you until I decide which one I like best.” You would have flipped!
Ya gotta relax my dear. I’ve been really hurt before too…. But you can’t use what someone else did against you as “reasons to stage attacks” on the new guy. If you KNOW it’s going to irritate you, if he says he can’t see you over a time you ask… then DON’T ask! This is a motto I had to learn…. And it’s done me very well!