Ever had a huge crush on a friend, dated them, then gotten over it?

My ex said he had a crush on me from the time he saw me. He got the guts to act on his feelings once we actually became close friends. I liked him only as a friend, but gave him a chance. He used to notice things about me and say things and get jealous over things only the way a guy who truly cares about you can.

We broke up after a year of dating. He said he started feeling stressed and liking me less. It wasn't anything I did. He just felt scared. Plus, this was his first real relationship. He couldn't see us ever ending, and that was too scary for him.

I still have to see him at school in our small program everyday. We have to work on group projects ALL the time. I can't get over him because we used to have a really good time. I told him I still liked him this week. He said "I think you're very good looking and a good person, I just don't want a relationship"

Has this happened to you? Where you have a big crush on a friend, date them, then stop liking them? (Its not my personality...I am very sweet and low maintenance)


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What Girls Said 1

  • Hey girly,

    I'm really sorry this happened.Its terrible because not only did you lose a relationship with him,the closeness you once had is temporarily gone.This did happen to me about two years ago with a really good friend of mine.We decided to give dating a try.We knew each other for two years before dating.We dated for a year and a half.We just realized that we are a little too different to be actual lovers and in a relationship.Honestly,afterwards it was terrible.I felt terrible,he felt terrible...and we weren't really speaking to each other for about six months.Not because we hated each other,but mainly because we wanted to heal from the sadness of the ending of our relationship.After six months of not speaking,he texted me and I would text him back.Then we would hang out with mutual friends.And slowly but surely,we started to become good friends again.Now,we are great together as FRIENDS.We missed each others sompany terribly while we were apart,and now we are inseperable as friends.Six months of not talking did wonders.

    My advice to you?Time is your friend.You cannot help how HE is feeling.You know that is is not your fault.Its nothing YOU did.Its just him and where he is in his life.Who knows what will happen in the future,but for right now,both of you have to try and move forward.ESPECIALLY YOU.Having to see him often is ROUGH.But you must find strength to do it for right now.Be cordial to him,and try and empathize with where he is coming from.I'm sorry this is happening,but guess what?!?

    This situation will help you to grow as a person.That's life eh?Sometimes things are awesome,sometimes there is pain.Dating this guy is still fresh for you,but guess what?You WILL move past this and find someone else regardless of this situation.Right now it seems impossible,but you will eventually find someone who brings you joy just like this guy did.Right now you of course need time to mourn the loss of the relationship...but I guarantee you will find someone else.As for the friendship,girl give it TIME.Spend time with friends,work on projects etc.Anything to move past your friend.Things will get better I promise.If you need to talk I'm here.