Why didn't he propose? Nerves got the best of him maybe?

My boyfriend and I have been in a long distance relationship for 4 years and we visit each other every 3-6 months depending how much we miss one another. (LOL) This time around he came to visit me.

Now here's the story; I found out that he bought a ring for me and it was verified when we were talking about the ring he took back and he stated that he wanted to get one prettier and then he said "I think you'll like it." So right there that meant he bought a new one. A few weeks later he states that he wanted to take me out somewhere romantic when he was here with me. He wouldn't tell me what it was and said it was a surprise. So then it clicked in my head like he's probably going to do it since we NEVER go on romantic dates.

He flew in and we had a good night and the next day (surprise date day) we traveled to this beautiful resort with a bay view; super romantic. Once we got in I asked him for gum and he said it was in his bag, and he started walking quickly over to it and I went to get it, but when I did, he snatched the bag out of my hand and when he did that I saw the ring box inside, it was a white box with a gold rim. From then on my heart dropped like he's really going to do this... At that time he didn't know I saw it he just thought I was gonna dig my hand in the bag. But here is the weird part. We go on this really fancy dinner date where he dressed up for, and I know my boyfriend hates dressing up with button down shirts and dress shoes, so I guessed this had to be it and after we went into this private room for dessert where the noise was just perfectly blocked out. He looked a bit nervous shaking his leg, not talking much but there was small talk and glares from across the table. After we walked by the bay where it was just us enjoying the view and we stopped and I hugged him for a long time and told him how much I love him and all and he said his words back and then asked if I was ready to head back to the hotel room. Right then I was crushed- but still had hope that maybe by the end of the night he'd do it. To cut to the chase, he never did it. He was leaving 4 days later so I kept hope that he'd do it then but all the way up to the airport ride to drop him off_ he never said a word. I just don't understand what all of it was for if he never even proposed? Or why bring the ring along with you if it's not gonna happen?... I'm just really confused.


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  • Sounds like he psyched himself out. They put A LOT of pressure on themselves to the point where sometimes they scare themselves out of asking. He'll work up to it again. Just be patient with him.

    • I see what you mean and totally agree. And yeah, I have a lot of patience and will wait until he's ready. He moves in with me in February and that's when I'll see him next, so maybe next year.