Where can I meet women to date?

I'm 21 and haven't been on a date in like 8 months. I'm very down about it and have been for a long time.

Cold approach doesn't work. I've tried approaching women during the day (on the street, in parks, libraries, coffee places, shops, ect) as well as in clubs/bars. I can't even get conversations. They reject me right from the start because I am ugly. I was rejected over 600 times in a row.

My friends are all either unattractive guys (most are socially awkward, ugly, kissless virgins) or girls who have boyfriends and predominantly hang out with guys. Essentially none of my friends can or will introduce me to any girls.

Everyone at work is 5 or more years older than me, most are married and have kids, so obviously none of these women are viable options for me. I don't have much in the way of qualifications or experience so finding a new job will be difficult, although I am looking.

I've also tried attending various groups to meet women, I started learning Spanish but the only young ish female in the class already has a boyfriend, even she was 4 years older than me so it was a long shot. I also tried going to yoga and dance classes but everyone was like 30+.

I haven't always been incapable of getting any attention despite being ugly. At school I had girls interested in me, I just didn't act on it because I was quite shy. I came out of my shell at college and had a few girlfriends and a couple of one night stands. However I'm now basically incel.

Nobody suggest online dating or I'm likely to have another breakdown and end up getting banned from this place yet again.


Most Helpful Girl

  • well you can't be ugly if you are getting dates and girlfriends in the past. you must be somewhat attractive. but I'm pretty much in the same boat as you. I'm pretty and haven't had a boyfriend in 5years. all the guys I go on dates with pretty much expect sex on the first date and I'm not that kinda girl. I have morals and standards. and I'm not friendzoning any guys because the guys who are my friends either are in a relationship already or just plain not interested in be for anything but sex. its really annoying because all my friends are in these awesome relationships and having great boyfriends and I can't sh*t jack sh*t! I'm pretty and I know that, I'm smart and outgoing and funny and guys know that about me. they tell me I'm an awesome person all the time but none of them want a relationship and it makes me feel like there is something wrong with me. :(

    • you can't possibly be in the same boat as him. you are a girl, this guy probably wouldn't care too much about being single if one of his very few dates had wanted sex pretty soon after dating. Do these guys just try to take you to their apartment/house right away?, or straight up say they wanna have sex with you? I would like to do that on first dates sometimes, but I'm not as blatant, at least I wait several dates

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • try online dating such as match.com, eharmony.com, and christianmingle.com (if your a christian :))

    • "Nobody suggest online dating or I'm likely to have another breakdown and end up getting banned from this place yet again."

    • Show All
    • Dude, you're so young to think of this as permanent. Everyone goes through a dry phase and it's just temporary. If you keep on thinking that this will be perpetual then that's what you gonna invite in your life. It's all about positivity :).

      That just means that every one has different taste/like when it comes to physical appearances. Some girls would look ugly to you but those ugly girls look cute to other guys...

    • Looks are not entirely subjective. They are mostly objective. If girls all like completely different things why is David Gandy a successful male model rather than me? Complete luck?

      I haven't had unpaid sex in over a year. This is why I want solutions. Not just wait and hope for the best.

  • yeah yeah yeah with the 600 rejections we get it.


What Guys Said 3

  • it seems most people end up meeting their future significant other through their social circle, mutual friends

  • try a prostitute

  • Online dating is terrible. It works OK for women but for men it is a huge waste of time, mainly because there are way more guys than girls on all the dating sites.

    • I know this.

      I have a friend who is a metalhead, so has long hair, but is clearly male. I made a dating profile using his pictures and set his gender as female, more guys were interested in him than girls were in my legitimate profile for myself.