I ended something with a girl about 10 months ago. The situation made me ill and it didn't do her any good either. We just messed around with each other. basically it was friends with benefits and it was like that for a few years. I had other girlfriends within that time period but they never worked out. There's not a bad thing I would say about her but everything had to end including the friendship simply because of the stress that it caused.
I work with her in this shop and sometimes I speak to her cause its part of the job and you have to remain professional but I don't always talk to her as there's no need.. So its really sad that I can't even speak to her without her holding onto every little word I say.
She hadn't texted me for about 8 months then out of the blue today I was talking to a friend of hers who I'm really good friends with and she came over and I didn't say anything whilst she was speaking to her mate cause I have nothing to say to her. And just about an hour ago I got an abusive text message saying I need to make my mind up about how I'm gonna be etc.. she called me a few things and she was saying I lack respect. Surely that's a bit hypocritical seeing she's calling me names? Who else would respond to someone who's name calling if they don't get their own way? And I don't want to argue with her either.
So why can't she let go?
Most Helpful Girl
This is the exact reason that I don't do the whole "friends with benefits" thing. That never ever works out. Someone always catches feelings if not both which is completely normal ..and expected
Humans create a chemical bond as they spend so much time together. You can't control it. However, even with that bond she and you may know that you two will never be together seriously but the fact that it had to end creates a lack of control over the emotions.
Your emotions (or hers actually) are telling her she wants you.. since she can't have you her defensive mechanism may be to insult you. She needs to create this bad guy image in her subconscious in order to get over this.
Honestly, my advice to you is to never enter into another relationship of this type. It never ends good. And I would just ignore her if you can. Responding to her is only feeding her desire to belittle you.2