My boyfriend forgot my birthday yesterday.

yesterday morning we woke up and were rushing around to get ready for work, so I don't blame him for forgetting it was my birthday. he has so much on his mind in the morning. but as we said our goodbyes he said "have a great day today" and I said "oh I will, its my birthday". I was kind of a brat about it I realize now, I was just upset at the thought that he had no idea it was my birthday. he knew it was his mind was just somewhere else in the morning. it was an honest mistake and I feel bad about being a brat to him about it. so then I got in my car and drove to work and he texted me saying happy birthday. I told him I would have appreciated a phone call rather than a text. you know maybe like "im sorry it was an honest mistake I didn't mean to forget, happy birthday I hope you have a great day". but instead I just got a text message and then made me even more upset. then he told me to chill when I said "thanks for remembering, I would have preferred a phone call". so then after work I was expecting maybe like some flowers or something just to show that he's sorry and he cares, but instead he tells me he's going to go to the gym. I was like "are you serious, you can't take one day off from the gym?" and he didn't like that very much. we've been together for almost three years, he knows when my birthday is but yesterday I felt like he just didn't even really care. he didn't even get me a card, just presents (but a card is more important to me). he started a new job working long hours and he is stressed and under pressure from the new job, so sometimes I feel bad and I feel like I'm asking too much or overreacting, but I really can't help but feel like he just didn't care yesterday. do you think he just had other things on his mind (like work, etc) or does he really not care? he never makes a big deal about his birthday, but I always do. I spend the day with him, shower him with love and gifts and I just make sure he knows how special he is to me. I didn't get that feeling at all yesterday on my birthday. he actually got mad at me for making him feel bad that he didn't realize it was my birthday. I know he's under so much stress at work but that isn't an excuse to take it out on me. am I overreacting/being a princess?


Most Helpful Girl

  • thats just how guys are sweetheart /: and honestly hell yeah it was wrong of him to not bring you baack flowers or a card because those are the most important things to a girl on her bitrthday & wow no way the gym reallly...i don't even know how you put up with that I would be like are you fucking kiddng me right now in my oppinion you reacted perfectly fine because if I was his girlfriend I would have been killing him. I have a bad temper & tht wudnt have flown by with me . lol so no your fine.


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  • I honestly think you are overreacting. He texted you happy birthday and he got you gifts. I mean, he wouldn't have gotten you anything if he didn't care. But, birthdays just aren't that big of a deal to some people. That's probably why he doesn't place much emphasis on his own birthday and probably didn't think you would want him to dedicate his entire day to you.

    You said it yourself, he's stressed and has a lot on his mind in the mornings, maybe going to the gym de-stresses him and helps him relax. I really think you're blowing this way out of proportion. He's a man, men don't think the same way as women. You see this as him "not caring about my birthday because he didn't get me a card" and to him he's probably just thinking "I told her happy birthday and got her a gift, what more does she want?"

    I just think you're being too hard on him and expecting too much. Like I said, men and women think differently and view things like birthdays differently (in general, but it also depends on the person). I think you should just let it go. This is a problem I've noticed with many women, they typically let the smallest things that a man does (or doesn't do) get to them. Some things you just have to chalk up to him being a man and let it go.

    I'm not saying men are emotionless because they're not, they have feelings too, BUT they do not typically show them in the same way that women do. I guess that's my point. In my opinion, he did not mean to hurt your feelings. He probably thought what he did was enough for you and didn't realize you were expecting more. Try not to be so hard on him.

  • Yesterday was my birthday too! So happy belated birthday, birthday twin :) Lol

    But about your question. I'm sure your boyfriend didn't mean to forget, like you said he was busy. I'm sure he would have remembered later that morning.

    My boyfriend isn't much of a gift person either. He's not very creative when it comes to gifts, and I have to beg him to give me a card with it, as I love getting cards.

    I think most men aren't ones to give thoughtful or sentimental gifts. Men (not all) can be really crappy gift getters. What I do is specifically tell my boyfriend what I want so he has a basis to go on. Like this year I want jewelry, so I told him (fake) gold with one stone for a ring.

    Also, maybe he's just not the type to make a big deal out of birthdays. I'm not either, we just go out to eat and I get a few gifts and I'm good.

    I'm sure he cares about your birthday, he just didn't outwardly show it like you would.

    • happy birthday to you too :) he got me all the gifts that I hinted at wanting which was great, but I really would have liked a card with those things. he's extremely forgetful so I can't fault him, I'm just more upset about how he reacted. I didn't mean to make him feel bad but his way of dealing with things is basically by not dealing with them, or giving me an attitude to kind of flip the situation around on me so he doesn't feel as bad if that makes sense :(

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