What to do about a guy I like?

I am good friends with this guy who recently broke up with his girlfriend. They are done for good (he found out she cheated and won't take her back) he has on numerous occasions told me that I'm "smart, pretty, sweet, and level-headed" and that he likes me and is just afraid to get hurt. He also told me he is attracted to me and that we have a lot in common and that I am the most "drama-free" girl he's ever met and he's worried that my level-headed calmness will change if we date (like I'm just acting that way to get him to fall for me) he calls me and texts me every day--we talk for at least an hour even if I've seen him that day--we go to dinner and he introduced me to his friends and even was calling me "his old lady" and "his girl" and kissing me in front of them. I was there for him during the whole thing with his ex and he has told me that I'm a wonderful person and wouldn't jeopardize our friendship and possibly more for her. Even more he always acts concerned over whether or not I'm happy and comfortable. He told me there is a chance for an "us" but he needs time and that he doesn't want to rush into anything until he's sure because he doesn't want to do it halfway and that if we date he wants to do it whole-heartedly. We've had sex before and dated briefly --he won't even have sex with me because he doesn't want me to think our relationship is just sex. Or to lead me on because he said he doesn't want to hurt me especially over sex. What do I do? Does it sound like he likes me? I want to think he does but I don't know---is that how a guy acts when he cares about someone why aren't we dating yet? I know he's not seeing other girls because he's with me everyday. He treats me like a girlfriend in every sense except the title. And he got really hurt when I told him to either date me or that I had to move on (that's when he told me to do what I had to to make myself happy and we could just be friends but that he wanted to date me once he got his head straight again). Any thoughts?

1) he also calls me when he can't sleep or to see how my classes at college went...

2) he has told me his secrets...and let me borrow his car...(so I'm not thinking trust is that big an issue)


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What Guys Said 1

  • It sounds like he keeps asking for permission to be uncertain. He treats you like a girlfriend already, yet says he is afraid of making it official because of how other women have treated him. You already gave him the ultimatum once that he needs to date you or move on... maybe you should try that again, but this time point out that you already do so many things together, that it's not much different. Since he thinks highly of you, play on that... Say that you are different and that he needs to give you the chance to be the trustworthy woman he knows he wants. He already knows it too, that is why he's hanging around still.

    Maybe you should try asking him out, or say that you are seriously interested in dating. Take action and say that you want to give it a try, don't leave the ball in his court. It could stay there a long time if he's getting comfortable with the situation. Get a little aggressive, but if he still can't make a decision, you should be the one to walk away. I don't think he will do it if you tell him to look for love elsewhere.


What Girls Said 1

  • If you start dating him now, which it seems you guys do, You are a rebound girl. He needs the time to be alone not jump into another relationship. He is dependent on females for companionship. Trust me on this one. Be friends only and do not kiss him and stuff. Just be a friend and start hanging out with other people separately. In a few months after he is alone, then try something.