Girls: What would you think of dating a guy who is a closeted-crossdresser?

So I'm 20, and straight, , however, I've always fantasized about dressing and acting effeminately. I'm usually told I'm cute or handsome, adorable also comes to mind, and on a few occasions, hot.

The salesgirls at Victoria's Secret love and adore me, and I'm on a first-name basis with at least some of them. They've been friendly and accommodating about allowing me to use the fitting rooms, and they're always willing to offer input and advice on fashion.

I have my own secret wardrobe of panties, bras and yoga pants, and getting a dress, make-up, high-heels, stockings and other feminine clothing is on my to-do list.

Anyway, I had always assumed that the Victoria's Secret SAs were only nice for superficial reasons, but the longer I've shopped, the more convinced I am that they're genuinely friendly and sincere toward me, and one SA named Kerry has told me that she loves seeing me and always says she misses me when I haven't been there in a while.

My question is this: What would girls (say, in their 20s) think of my secret lifestyle and would you be willing to accept it as part of your boyfriend's personality if he came out to you?


Most Helpful Girl

  • In early 20s I would've been too worried about what other people thought (immaturity on my part).

    Later 20s - if I found the guy really attractive it probably wouldn't matter. I have more confidence in my own beliefs and morality over other people's opinions, now.

    Although I would need to be clear on whether it's just a cross-dressing thing or whether the man has any feelings about being transgender. I have full respect for transgender people, but I wouldn't want to be with a woman myself. Having said that, if we were already a few years into the relationship and I dearly loved him, I might feel differently on that point.

    Hope this helps :)


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • As long as he was still the man I loved beneath the clothes that loved me enough to trust me with such a secret then I wouldn't truly care. I'd gain a shopping buddy to!

  • I would think he's gay TBH.


What Guys Said 1

  • i wouldn't let the sales girls at VS be the barometer. some of them may be cool and friendly about it, some may be accomodating, and some may just be hoping you'll buy stuff...

    I think you'd need to sort of disclose this lifestyle early on in a relationship. being closeted when single is one thing but being in a relationship is really about almost full disclosure. Some people may see cross dressing as a closeted or latent homo or bisexuality, some may simply be uncomfortable with their guy being into and some may be ok.

    perhaps a poll on the matter would help