Guys would you get jealous over this?

A few months ago I used to see a guy I found good looking in the grocery shop fairly often, he would make eye contact ,turn after me and follow me around the aisles but he wasn't creepy about it.It was interesting as he did make me feel a little shy and like a teenager as he is very manly but I'm not a teenager anymore for a couple of years now lol. I then met his brother who is a year younger then him recently at the gym and really fancy him more and we have flirted. Occasionally I still see the first guy and he makes eye contact like before and smiles but other times he ignores me completely ( he also has a girlfriend so its not like he is available but I never see him with her) I have swapped numbers with his brother but I'm not sure if his brother would try and interfere as he does seem to like to boss his younger brother around when I have seen them together. To be fair, the first guy did have a long term girlfriend of over a year when he was looking at me and flirting in the shop ( I saw on Facebook since we have mutual friends lol) so he has no right to be annoyed in any sense. Since I have never technically done anything with the first guy would it be acceptable for me to go on a date with his brother if he does ask or would the first guy get jealous? I know guys have rules about dating friends exes but I'm hardly an ex lol

Thanks 4 the input guys ? I think I’m prob being a typical girl overanalyzing things which I try to avoid lol.When I’ve chatted to them at the gym, the older guy bosses his bro about so I was worried he might be an alpha male and think as he saw me first he could tell his bro not to go there but as we haven’t hooked up plus he has a girlfriend so that would be pretty ridiculous right? I can see why he might get jealous but as the older guy stayed with his girlfriend whilst casually flirting with me it’s
not like he was really into me as if he truly liked me he could have dumped his girlfriend and asked me out. He seems to be committed recently so hopefully he realized its wrong to flirt and will focus on his relationship. However I saw him at the shop a few times recently and he tried making eye contact again but I totally looked through him so he got the hint in case he thought I still liked him. I chatted more with his younger brother yesterday so I think I should stop worrying about him for the time
It was meant to say thanks for the input guys :) not a question mark lol


Most Helpful Guy

  • depends on the guy and the relationship his girlfriend.

    if their relationship (the dude and his gf) is serious he really shouldn't care. but if their relationship isn't all that serious or committed he may still like you and hold a grudge if you started dating his brother.

    Me personally probably wouldnt' care but I don't know your situation specifically. I would talk to the brother who is single and sort of feel him out and find out what he thinks his brother might think. ultimately it only matters what you and the guy you want to date thinks.

    • Thanks,I think Ill speak to the single one. The first guy wasn't too serious when I met him considering he had a girlfriend of over a year. For example he flirted with me and totally presented himself as single and I never saw them in public together.Since I've known his brother I have seen him with his girlfriend quite a lot and they seem happy together. However I've also seen him out after this and sometimes he would try making eye contact but I ignored him and he seems to have got the hint and stopped.

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What Guys Said 6

  • Depends on the guy, I myself do analyze situations often. But in analyzing this one, I don't think he'll be bothered to much. Since they are brothers I am sure they probably already spoke about it. It is a possibility he may see if its cool or not but in the long run I believe it'll turn out fine. I would move forward with it, but remain somewhat cautious, as a precaution if the other brother you were originally flirted with take issue. Personally I think everything will be fine and the original suitor will be cool with it, as you guys are already cool with each other, I would create some awesome double dates, specially if they get along well.

    • Thanks. Yeah I agree, I would have assumed they have discussed it but wasn't sure as the first guy had a long term girlfriend so not sure whether he would be keen to say he was flirting as he totally presented himself as single lol. I think I'll do that and remain cautious as obviously they are brothers so I'm aware if he does begin to have an issue that they would choose each other over me. Fingers crossed for some double dates in the future as it was never serious flirting anyway with the first guy.

  • Yeah, he would be jealous. I would too.

    Its lime me trying to have hopes if my relationship doesn't work out you (example) would be willing to be with me instead.

    But if my brother was with you already. It hurts my chance significantly. To say if the both of you don't work out, I wouldn't be able to go with you because it'd be kinda like sloppy seconds (not trying to be offensive) which would be why I can be jealous for.

    I hope this information helps.

    • Ah very true, I think no one could ever date a brother once you have been with the other one it would def be sloppy seconds lol. however in this situation he never really asked me to hook up so I'm hoping he wouldn't be too jealous to cause a problem, it was more implied in his behaviour when we first met like making eye contact and following me around and then when I saw him at a club he was hands on like hugging and putting his arm around my waist but we never crossed the line.

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    • Yeah true.Perhaps I see it more when I hang out with my female friends and they tell me theyre jealous over stuff to do with the guy they fancy or are dating. I also have male friends but I think guys are usually more reserved in general and only sometimes do they show jealousy openly.

    • Yeah, that's pretty much how I see it.

  • Yes, you are an adult, you weren't committed to the older brother, so therefore you have the green light to do what you want, plus, with the older brother having a girlfriend, it was wrong for him to be doing the things that he was doing.

    • Thats exactly what I thought, in my opinion a few times chatting and flirting before I realized he had a girlfriend doesn't mean that it should stop anything with his brother. He has no right to be annoyed, if anything I should have been bothered if I had really liked the older guy because he presented himself as single but had a girlfriend lol

  • If this first brother was serious with his girlfriend then you wouldn't even be a blip on his radar [besides just being a friend] and it would be totally fine to go with his bro. I have been in the same situation and to be honest didn't care that my bro dated her cause I had everything I needed with my girlfriend. hope I helped :3

    • thanks yeah that helped :) I thought that too, I was just a bit worried as the first brother seemed to be hiding his girlfriend for a while when I first knew him, like I would never see them together shopping or when I would see him out at a club he acted single (with other girls)Then when he saw I liked his brother I saw him with her quite often. It was probably just coincidence but it felt a bit like that lol. Hopefully he will be so focused on his own relationship there won't even be an

  • Sounds to me like this is 'much ado about nothing'! You do not mention your personal situation though you seem to know a lot about these two brothers. Flirting can be extremely fun and also it can be unbelievably dangerous.

    - Do you often look for 'hook-ups' in the grocery store?

    - Is it day light or dark?

    - Do you shop alone?

    Being followed around by some guy you only know by eye contact is very creepy! Keep Your Guard Up Sister!

    On the other hand, running into some guy or the other way around 2 or 3 times while shopping is a good opportunity for a broad smile and to start a conversation. It can be fun & doesn't have to be anything more than a casual friendship.

    Things to talk about with a guy while in a grocery store:

    - "Hi, can you help me? I can't reach (or lift) that." (Major turn on for a guy no matter the age to be asked for help by a damsel in distress)

    - "We have to keep meeting like this" (talk about the WOW factor)

    - "How do you like shopping here?" or a variation "...Shopping at ANY grocery store?" (most men hate grocery store shopping so be ready for that kind of reply)

    The only time you should have to worry about jealousy is when you are in a relationship that both of you want to last forever!

    • Well I never knew the first guy too well, we only chatted a couple of times but I knew his brother more as we go to the same gym and then his brother came with him once and I realized theyre brothers lol. I was on Facebook and saw the first guys Facebook as we never added each other and it showed he has a girlfriend which was surprising. I don't look for hook ups in grocery stores haha I would see him at like 4 or 5pm after work which is prob why I wasn't worried as it wasn't dark even though I was alone

  • "and follow me around the aisles"

    Funny how he is not creepy simply because he's good looking

    • it wasn't the fact that he was good looking which made it not creepy, it was because I did give him signals that I liked him back and smiled at him etc, a guy can be the best looking guy but if he starts following me around and invading my personal space without any reciprocation I would still find him creepy regardless of his looks

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