Can she still see me in that way?

I know every girl is different, as well as every situation, but I wanted to see if there was a general consensus on the issue I'm having.

To summarizes as best as I can: I've known this girl for about 10 years now, and growing up she had a huge crush on me. A couple years ago we went on a few dates, but I felt like it was lacking something so I left it alone.

We both did our own things for a while but eventually started talking again. The more we talked the more I started to catch feelings for her and I ended up feeling a lot like she did the first time around. The problem now is that she has a boyfriend. I get the impression she's not very happy with him, and she can be very flirty with me, so I thought for sure she was still interested. When I talked to her about it she told me that her boyfriend was "too genuine" for her to leave him, but if something happened then we'd have a good foundation to build on.

She's still overly flirty and makes referrences to inside things we had when we went on dates so I'm lost as to what the hold up is with her and I. It's been about 2 months since we talked and I'm so lost as to what to do.

Girls: Is it possible that she still has feelings for me or did I ruin my chances by ending it the first time? And does it sound like I may be stuck in her Friend Zone now?

Guys: Have you ever been in this position before, and if so what would your best advice to me be as far as getting what I want or moving on.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I doubt that she has any strong feelings for you, given that she refuses to break up with her boyfriend for whatever reason. If she truly liked you more than her boyfriend, she would break up with him in a heartbeat (not something I would recommend, though, since jumping from relationship to relationship is unhealthy). I think she might be keeping you on the back burner just in case if something happens between her and her boyfriend. And maybe her boyfriend doesn't give her enough attention, so she seeks it from you. I also think that you might be reading a bit too much into her "signs". Having inside jokes doesn't necessarily mean she's flirting with you. And you getting the impression that she might not be happy in her relationship is also you probably only seeing/hearing the things you want to see/hear. Unless she has directly told you that their relationship sucks all the time, you have no reason to think that it does.

    Yes, you are in the friend zone. She's not making any genuine moves on you, and she has a boyfriend. Definitely in the friend zone.

    • Meh the truth hurts but everyone needs to hear it. Everything makes much more sense when looking at it from this perspective. Thank you for the eye opener!

    • No problem. I hope you find someone else that likes you back at the right time :)

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What Girls Said 1

  • Its really good chance because the first crush the first love is hard to forget! Even if she's in relationship and she loved you I think you gonna be special for her for pretty looong time.

    doesn't mean she wants to be with you.

    • Hmm very interesting outlook that I hadn't thought of. I don't assume I can change her mind if that last line is the case, but what is it that would prevent you from wanting to be with someone you had feelings for?

    • maybe: she doesn't see you "that way" anymore. she loves her boyfriend,but here she looks to be with him because of pity?. I think you have a chance,but then there is that boyfriend :/

      try to make her feel the way she felt with you when she was in love with you.

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