My boyfriend asked me to move in, after just 3 months of dating?

Well the other day he said he had a "special date" planned. That date turned out to be him showing me an apartment he bought, yes BOUGHT, for "us".

We've known each other for almost a year but didn't start dating until 3 months ago, so I'm kinda of speechless

I mean I'm crazy about him. Right now.

He's from a wealthy family so maybe he doesn't realize that for most people, it's a huge financial commitment. If we break up, I'd be homeless. I can't really talk to him about that. I kinda suggested something like that once and he was already hurt about me thinking of a life after him. I don't know how else to bring it up though or what to do?

On the other hand I'm really really in love with him. Also we live in NYC and it's an amazing apartment. Although even thinking makes me feel like a hooker. One that doesn't do sex, because we didn't do it yet.

Is that maybe an ulterior motive? More Intimacy? It's admittingly kind of hard between college dorm rooms and his parents place.

Well tomorrow would be the last day I could get my money for college accommodation so I need decide quick. Should I

a) politely decline

b) just do it

c) do it and pay for college housing anyways as back up?

If the last option, should I tell him about that?


Most Helpful Girl

  • How old are you guys? If you're still in college or not in college yet I assume you're a bit too young in my opinion and I need to tell you this from personal experience... I've been with my boyfriend for 2 years now and when we were together for 3 months it was like we were both walking on clouds. We didn't know what hit us. Reality strikes much quicker when you guys start living together and get to know eachother on a whole other level. As for the intimacy, its sort of obvious that it will lead to you two having sex, it's nothing wrong it's just obvious in my opinion since you'd be living together. No matter how in love you believe you are now, even considering you guys were never actually intimate with each other it still seems as though you're in that beginning phase of the relationship where you're infatuated with each other. Believe me it gets much harder and if I were you I would enjoy this cute lovey dovey mysterious like phase now cause in a few years if you're still together you're gonna miss it cause relationships get tough. I think it would be more ideal to live close to each other if needs be or maybe start living with him but keep a back up place where you can stay cause you really don't want to end up on the streets if it doesn't work out well. I'm not saying it won't but you get to know a lot more about a person once you start living with him! Think it true and reflect.

    • I just turned 21, he is 23. I haven't been in any relationships before him so all I know about is just kinda tell tales to me. While he has been, so I'm thinking he might have a better idea of what he's getting into than me.

      About sex. I know it's gonna happen. That's good, I want it. But I don't to feel it's the price of moving in with him. Sure it''d be easier living together, but we can be intimate in other places too

    • yes the way you're reasoning in is definitely a mature start... I would be cautious if I were you I don't know if he's ever lived with another girl in the past cause that would mean he has even more experience and I would personally be even more cautious. As I said I would still keep a back up and if I were you I'd rather have my appartment close to his then could bunk at his place or him at mine cause we all need our space and it's a bit early to spend every night with him from now.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • See Fast Thing he Loves you

    But He want Surprise you I think so

    and about Money

    dont thing a Money will be Problem for you or him

    Because he don't care about Money at all

    and he care about you

    and don't Remember to him any thing about Money he will hate it

    Because he loves in has Heart

    if he Not like any man make sex With you and dump you

    and if you Ready tell him how you feel about him

    and Good Luck

    • I wasn't raise like that. It's not normal for guy you're not married to, to spend that much money on you

    • its Not Problem you will Adjust that He Spend money Because he Don't want to loss you

      But in he way he show you and you make him happey and he waiting to your reply

      to tell him you love him

      Because he love you

      i give you a A small example

      ho like a Rose he take it but ho love a Rose make him Grow and make more of him

      the love Best thing you can have in your life

      and Good Luck

What Girls Said 3

  • It seems fast, and you're worried for all the right reasons. You're thinking clearly about a situation that many don't, and will save yourself a lot of stress in the future. If I were you, since it's so new and you're worried/unsure, hold it off. If he's planning to get an apartment anyway, you can always visit him a lot and spend a majority of your time there with him. It can feel like you're living together, without actually giving up your other residence before you truly know where the relationship is going to go.

    He may be a bit hurt, but a guy who loves you can respect that decision considering you've only been dating 3 months. If he can't respect that, then he may not be for you. He may be the type to rush and demand his way, which won't work out in the future anyway.

  • It seems fast yes. But you know, my flat is 10 minutes away from my boyfriend's and in our five month of relationship I slept in my time...when we did a party there. I'm gonna move out my stuff soon to officially move in with him. Somehow, it's stupid to pay two rent. I'm still a student but I know that if we broke up, I'll look for another flat...

  • B) Do it try it out no problem