Did he lose interest? Was it his business? Was it me? Was it other things?

Hi! So for about a year, my good friend has been trying to set me up with her boyfriend's best friend. I never really wanted to because he never seemed like my type, (he's a country boy, I'm a girly girl). But a couple of months ago, we met each other, and hit it off. We began seeing each other a lot. We were pretty shy around each other at first, but then we really got to know each other, and, to my shock, I really liked him. I have been hurt before, so it took a while for me to be completely comfortable around him.

He, as I said, is a country boy. He is only 21 and he has his own landscaping business (he is no longer in school, so this is what he does for a living). He was always a perfect gentleman. On our second date, he informed me that his parents were alcoholics and that he didn't like to be home a lot because they would drink straight Jack, get drunk, and fight a lot. He also said he doesn't like to drink. Despite this, he was always doing things for his parents and the rest of his family. Throughout my seeing him, he talked about having kids a lot, and being rich some day.

Early on, we talked nonstop and saw each other about three or four times a week. On our fifth date, he kissed me, and told me that he actually wanted to wait longer to kiss me, but it just happened that night. After seeing him almost two months, he told me he wanted to make us official, but he had been hurt before and wanted to take it slow. I then told him that I had been hurt too.

Because of both of our busy schedules, for the next month, we didn't see or talk to each other as much, which I didn't mind. Although I was becoming insecure about the fact that we weren't dating, I started to fall in love with him. We didn't do "IT" but we both did touchy stuff to each other. I told him that I felt that it was moving too fast, but didn't tell him why (he said he wanted to go slow!) He said although he disagreed, he felt that he could open up to me more. He then said that when he was hurt twice before they came as a shock to him.

The last night I saw him, he said he always thought of me, and that we wouldn't do "it" until we were very in love. Two days later, he became very distant, and a couple after that, he told me he needed to work on his business and he couldn't see me for a while. We texted about every week and a half for two months, but after a while I gave up, and I didn't text him Merry Christmas (after 2 weeks of not talking). The next day, I was surprised to see that he texted me to wish me a good holiday. It's been two weeks, and I texted him earlier today saying I hope everything was well, and he didn't answer back. Also, a couple days ago, he was tagged in a status with his friend, his girlfriend, and a girl basically saying they were getting drunk.

Does anyone have any idea what happened? None of my friends or family know. I understand that it's over, but I would like to have an idea of what went wrong. Thanks


Most Helpful Guy

  • Well that's quite a surprising turn of events. It seems to directly contradict everything he's told you, which is strange seeing as his actions didn't indicate at all that he was leading you on or anything. Maybe he got 'seduced' by this chick and she had that kind of lifestyle. Either way it's not very classy of him though. :/

    • Thanks for answering! That's literally what everyone who knows about this (young, old, guy, girl, family, friend) has said, which is why I am so confused. The sad thing is, when I told him I had been hurt before, I told him that the guy lead me on and started dating someone who wasn't a very nice girl... his response was that I didn't deserve it and that he would punch the other guy in the face for hurting me if he found out who it was :/

    • Well sometimes guys (especially guys who've been hurt or who grew up in a bad environment) have issues that make them gravitate towards irresponsible, mean, bitchy women. I suspect that that's the case here, and sadly there's not much you can do about it. The guy's probably not even really a bad guy. He just has issues.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Really? Are you sure that's his actual girlfriend and not some old one?

    From what you said, it's indeed a surprising turn of events, but only he can clarify what's going on?