Are my standards too high?

I've been the over accepting nice, sweet, lenient girl before who gave losers who couldn't drive a chance and who couldn't pay for me and they turned into unambitiomless assholes. **** that I learned my lesson.

I now will only date if

He has his own vehicle



Takes me on occasional date without whining and can pay

Has a sense of humor

Taller than I ( I'm 5'1)

Can pick me up ( I'm 99-103lbs, any male who can't is a wimp)

And is not a total pansy nor obsessive

I don't mind slight clingy but they cannot set " rules" for me until I'm committed even then they really can't.

Good hygiene

I prefer mildly fat/muscle but really looks aren't the deal breaker usually it's there financial lack of ambition and personality. Facial hair is sexy too I like whiskers and I don't mind smokers.

I basically quit on a guy because His vehicle broke down and now he bums rides. I'm sick of driving to meet him it's been 2 months and he hasn't got it fixed when all it takes is reading a manual and don't say it's complicated my parents have always read manuals and fixed their own vehicles, so have I. He's also quite insecure and too sexual ( nice guy but I refuse " love" over myself)

Are my standards too high though? Or good? I'm sick of settling for less.

Yes guys I haven't even dated set " rules" for me. This one guy I courted casually , we only hung out once was okay but he told me I had text him before I went anywhere so he wouldn't get worried why I wasn't texting him and what I'm doing and we weren't even dating. I told him to screw off and that was controlling.


Most Helpful Guy

  • They're typical for a girl who is bitter. Right now you're definitely bitter because of someone not paying. I have heard of this problem before.

    I dated a girl who couldn't drive also and it got real old real fast. I found out the problem was because her parents controlled her too much. I dumped her because she wasn't getting a car for around 2 years she said and she whined about how she couldn't be bothered to get oil changes and such.

    Having a job should be a must and 18 and up makes sense, humor sure also.

    The taller thing I guess goes along with physical attraction but the pick me up thing sounds kinda silly. I guess you just have some "swept off your feet" fantasy.

    The pansy and obsessive comment is the bitterness showing. Plus the rules thing is probably something from a guy you dated too.

    Hygeine should be a given... why do I see so many having a problem here? Scary world.

    I think you just need another standard in regards to character here outside of the financial stability.

    The thing with paying is early on I actually discourage guys to give any money out until committed and based on how she is about money. Gold diggers are out there and while rare, girls do seek guys out. Guys living on their own have to watch out big time because girls will move in with a guy they don't like just for his possessions. Plus in this age of equality don't be surprised if a guy wants a girl to pay and take him out too. It is the age of equality now.

    • I've had two bad relationships with superficial younger kids, who expected I say I love you when I was being " the guy" position. They expected a ton in return and in the end I was more of an under appreciated mother than a girlfriend.

      I stopped playing nice after I got tired of paying and hauling them around and they turned on me.

      So yeah I bitter I guess, I'm sick of guys expecting me to drop over in awe when they really aren't doing anything impressive. I'm not a gold digger tho

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • Your standards aren't high, they are just artificial..and most modern guys are no longer willing to pay your way all the time. You'll only get the guys who are still into buying a woman's affections.

    That isn't a way to start a long term relationship! This may be a fine approach for casual dating, but you'll wind up complaining that all guys are jerks...

  • They don't sound bad at all. Now what are you negative traits so we can really know if you are settling or not. People always highlight their good traits and forget that the negatives are usually the difference between a date or not


What Girls Said 2

  • you have been burned as have I, and that is why you have set these standards, because you don't want to make the same mistake twice hey I understand. At 42 I have had my share of men who either didn't have a job or couldn't hold a job, or had no car. Whose fault is that? Mine and now I realize it. I will never get with another guy like that again. Id rather live alone the rest of my life vs. that.

    YOuve just had some real bad experiences and I understand your list especially the job, car, sense of humor, good hygeine are good ones. The "can pick me up" and taller than I" I think those are a little extreme.

  • Your standards are barely anything at all.

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