Another date with a another lady... oh will this ever end?

After the end of a long term relationship last year, I'm back on the market, and when on a date with a seventh girl tonight. The longest of the seven was two months. The shortest was two dates. Had my heart broken and vice versa.

I went on a date tonight with a really beautiful girl. We ate Indian food. The date lasted only two hours (we talked on the phone twice before, for a total of 2 and a half hours combined). She said she wanted to get groceries before it closed in an hour. I asked her if she wanted to get a drink near by, but she declined saying she needed to get up early, and needed to get groceries... She told me if had nothing to do with "what was going on here", referring to our date. Anyway, we left, and hugged, and she may have said something like "we'll talk soon", I can't remember because I was nervous.

Maybe there is no way to get insight into this, but do you think I'll have a shot at a second date? We talked to the whole time, and it never got awkward.


Most Helpful Girl

  • There is one lesson I've learned in my years as an adult and that is: stop putting so much weight on people & events. Enjoy the date as it is happening and when it ends, find something else to enjoy instead of focusing on the past enjoyment. Putting your attention on the past keeps you in the past and, as a result, holds you back. If you two were a match of some sort, then you'll get together again. If not, then you won't. But then there will be another person who will come along to have another enjoyable moment with. So whatever you're doing, whoever you are with, make it your mission to enjoy yourself at that moment. This method will eliminate a great deal of your stress.

    • You may be right. About five years ago I would believe you, because I couldn't find anyone. I've been lucky enough to date a lot of girls since I broke up with my long term girlfriend recently. I got a kiss from a girl tonight... My only worry is it al goes away, and I can't find anyone every again.

    • Shes right, if it is meant to be between the two of you, it will be. Enjoy your dates and don't worry, I mean she said "we'll talk soon", I think that says something right there so your just over thinking it. Don't worry about never having anyone, there's someone for everyone and there's plenty of woman out there. Just be calm and enjoy your time. :)

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What Girls Said 1

  • She left the date early to get groveries an to wake up early to get if I like someone ...that will wait! Grocery shopping is always there!

    • You could be right. Its definitely true that she wasn't ga ga over me. But we talked the whole evening, talked before ordering and after all the food was gone. I texted her the next day about how I had a nice time. It's been about 30 hours with no response. Probably over. That's fine. Sort of shitty that some women these days are even too cowardly to they're not interested over text. I found her attractive. She had a good job, she was no offensive personality wise... oh well, I'm not gaga either

    • Sumtime we like to disappear I have been known to do that as I don't wana hurt their feelings. But if you weren't gaga then good ...move on! one goodbye sets you up for a better hello!

What Guys Said 1

  • This doesn't sound especially promising but you won't know for sure until you do speak to her again. Even if she was uncertain last night she may change her mind later.

    It would probably help all around if you stopped thinking of them as dates and thought of them as people. Each girl is unique. They have hopes and dreams and fears and bad experiences. The more you can focus on those, the more you can focus on her. This will help with nervousness and make a better impression overall.

    • I don't know where you got the idea that I wasn't thinking of them as people? I can't find one instant where I referred to them as a "date".I referred to the meeting of me and the girl as a date. I am completely aware that each girl is unique, and they have hopes,dreams,fears,and bad experiences.What gave you the idea I wasn't aware of this?

      Also, it doesn't sound promising?It is because she wanted to get groceries and go to bed on a Tuesday night after a first date? What was supposed to happen?

    • Show All
    • Do you see what I'm referring to? "Another date with another lady" and "Will this ever end?" makes them sound interchangeable and monotonous. I realize that this is not what you intended and that may be part of the problem. You may not realize how you sound with comments like that.

    • So I should say, "another meeting with a girl who is unique in their own way"? I think part of the problem is my looks and personality, not semantics. I was dumped twice, and I dumped two girls. For those two girls, I must have been doing something right if they wanted to be with me.