Is it possible for a guy to talk to a girl online who he has never met and not make her afraid of him?

Is there a form of etiquette for talking online to somebody you have never met in person for the first time? What are some guidelines (if any)? Are girls automatically afraid of meeting a stranger online? Do any girls have stories where you met a friend online, and you never would have met your friend unless you had the internet?

I get the impression that being polite is not enough. Perfect examples are on websites such as this one, myspace, or facebook. I am not talking about online dating; I am asking about friendships or pen pals if you want to call it that. Of course the opportunity to meet in person should be there also for a friend you met online.

I've met some people who met some of their friends online (on facebook) who lived in the same city, then they met in person at a party, bar, or social event sometime later. Now those people know each other well as friends and hang out together. I guess those are rare cases where friendships originated online.

Are girls automatically going to assume a guy is creepy if he talks to her online? And is there nothing he can do? I am not asking about meeting guys online, because guys generally are not afraid of talking to people online.


Most Helpful Guy

  • I think it's generally better, or at least easier, to do this on forums and message boards as opposed to things like Myspace or Facebook. I have met and befriended numerous girls this way. Hell, one of them, who I had gotten to know really well over the course of a year or two, wanted to come to my state and visit me at one point, but I objected, but I guess that's kind of irrelevant.

    Anyway, if you're on a social website, you should probably just assume that they're open to conversing with you. Why would they be on a social website if they didn't want to socialize?


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • I think its automatically assumed that you are creepy, but you can prove that you aren't by not making any 'creepy' jokes. Like, until you guys are close don't be making sexual comments[unless she does, I guess] or anything like that. Don't ask for her number or any personal information until quite a bit of time has passed. Other than that if you are polite and all that then I don't see why friendships can't happen online.

    I have one online pal who is from a whole different country than me, we're pretty close and I don't think he is creepy - though I still don't think I would give him my phone number yet.

    Anyways, yes, online friendships are cool as long as you are polite and respectful =]


What Guys Said 1

  • I think that most of us have heard horror stories about online dating, so common sense says you shouldn't try to meet anyone online until you've been talking for quite a while. Then you should suggest a very safe time and place for a first meeting; daylight hours, busy place with a lot of people around...

    There's no code of etiquette, but we need to use common sense.

    There's no reason to think online friendships aren't as promising as meeting complete strangers in bars and the like!