Which one should I choose?

I've found the man I want to spend my life with, but right now there are complications, and we can't be together. We have both discussed at great length and agree that we're both completely fine with seeing and sleeping with other people in the meantime.

I decided to seek out a short term friends with benefits relationship. I've narrowed it down to two guys and now I'm not sure which one I should go with.

One of them is local, and I not only knew him in HS, I had a crush on him even though he didn't like me. The crush was purely superficial, not at all based on the traits that really matter. He's really enthusiastic about reconnecting and getting to know the new me, my friends like him, and my future lover approves of him. He's looking for something exclusive with no strings or labels attached, but he still wants to go out with me on dates and do "couples stuff". A casual romance with sex; this is exactly what I'm looking for, but I'm honestly worried that he might fall for me.

The other guy is in the military, stationed an hour away. He's married, and in an open relationship, and has no other girls on the side right now. I'd be the only one. He's leaving in August to move back to his home state, so there wouldn't be any awkward situations when it's all over, because he'll be gone. But he can't have me at his place, because she doesn't want it in her bed, I can totally understand. I can't bring either guy to my place. and I'd be sharing him with another woman (yeah I know it's his wife)

So I'm down to sharing a married man Vs a friend that I used to fuck in the same circle of friends as my intended future lover.


Most Helpful Guy

  • I think picking some else even just to have sex with could be detrimental to your 'the one'.

    • He's actually my best friend, so we're really open with each other. We've tried dating before. I took some more time single and trying to get to figure out what went wrong with us before. We've both decided to move on and see other people, because we don't work. I'm not anywhere near ready to settle down.

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