We had three dates. Haven't heard back from her?

I went on three dates with this nice woman. Even brought her her favorite flowers on the third date. I've had a hard time getting close to her like holding hands or something because she tends to keep her arms and hands busy by like gripping her scarf or purse. I went to hugh her and then went to plant a kiss on her cheek. I did so but as I finished I wondered if he hadn't tried to turn her head for a full kiss. We still had a nice time. I knew she didn't want to do anything Friday (She has already stated she dislikes going out Fridays because it's the start of her weekend and she relaxes). I call her Friday night to talk and ask if she wanted to go out again. I left a voicemail; first time I've had to. Oh, she had also mentioned she was spending the day with a friend this weekend but didn't say which day. Well, 26 hours later, I have not heard back from her.

I'm guessing don't call again? Leave it up to her? If she doesn't want to go out again, I'll be disappointed, but I'd prefer she at least text that, so I don't know what's up. If I did call again, when should I?

Could it be cause I didn't go for full kiss? Maybe she doubts my interest? I do move slowly. I know this. Perhaps if we do go out for a fourth, simply being bold and saying I've thought about kissing her all week, and just do it at the start?



Most Helpful Girl

  • I wouldn't be too worried. Everyone goes at their own pace, and some are more naturally inclined to being all touchy from the start. With me, I found it a little difficult to kiss even after I had been dating my boyfriend for 2 weeks. I had him over at my place and we were watching a movie during which we loooked at each other and just had that moment where he went for the kiss. Even though that happened beginning of January, I still kinda get caught off guard when he goes in for a kiss when saying goodbye and such.

    In other words, just let it happen. She could've turned her cheek because she didn't see the kiss coming. Don't contact her again and if she reaches out to your, take it day by day. Let the moment where you just know you just have to kiss her happen. :)


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What Girls Said 2

  • There's really two situations here.
    1) She is just nervous, feels uncomfortable. She may not be that experienced, and might be nervous. She might be uncomfortable with PDA, so maybe check your environment when you're trying to kiss her. If you guys are all alone, she might be more open than if you're in a public setting.

    2) As for her not responding, she may be backing off right now. I think you're right, don't call again. I might send a text saying something along the lines of "hey, I had a fantastic time with you on our last date, and I think you're a wonderful person. Let me know if you want to meet up again!" And then the ball is in her court. If she's into you still, then she will respond. If not, then maybe it just wasn't meant to be! :)

    Best of luck!

    • Well, we were alone. It was when I walked her to the door of her building. But yes, I do get the sense she could be as shy and uncertain as me sometimes lol.

      So, if I were to send this text, when would you do it? Today, tomorrow?

    • Show All
    • Friday night, which was two days after the third date.

    • Yeah she never got back to me even after a text on Sunday saying what you suggested. I think that's kind of rude, and she don't strike me that way. I was debating if I should send one last text saying it was nice to meet her and sorry if I rushed things

  • I read someplace that folks who don't like to go out on Fridays maybe having a boyfriend who keeps them busy. try to find this out before you break your heart.

    • our first date was a Friday, but overall she told me on that date that after working Monday-Friday, she prefers to be a homebody on Fridays. I don't think she's seeing anyone else.

What Guys Said 3

  • Try not to second-guess details about the date. She has no reason to believe that you were not interested in another date. While it's possible that she isn't interested in another date, you can't conclude that from a delay in a reply. I would wait until after the long weekend and try calling again. Hopefully you'll get confirmation either way then if you don't hear from her before that.

  • keepin gher hands busy and ruling out Friday is a sign she's dating someone else..on Friday...and doesn't want her hands on you..on other days of the week!

    I think she just wanted threee free diners out, to be honest with you. A lot of that going around!

    • Maybe, but our coffee first date was a Friday. She works M-F and told me that day she is usually so exhausted she prefers to be at home that night after work, but the time and place worked so well she made an exception.

    • If she really liked you she would find the energy to make Friday!

  • Maybe she doesn't listen to her voicemail.

    I texted a girl on our third date and wondered why she didn't reply after 24 hours (she usually replies immediately). So I texted again asking if anything was wrong.

    Apparently she hadn't even received the first message. This was yesterday btw.