Ladies, am I over thinking this?

I met a woman on Eharmony about a week ago. The conversation went really well and after a couple days we were talking on the phone every night for hours. We talked about everything, interest, sex, past, and pretty much anything we could think to bring up. She asked if I wanted to meet up sometime, I said sure. I asked her to go out Friday, she said yes. I took her to dinner at a really nice restaurant. We talked, the conversation went well. We then went to a local show, a magic/comedy show. She was laughing a lot and obviously had a good time. Unfortunately, at the show we didn't get to talk much, hence the nature of a show. After it was done, I took her back to her car. We were sitting in the end of the car as the night ended and made plans to go out again in 9 days. I then gave her a regular kiss, which I admit was kinda awkward, kinda clumsy, I kinda felt retarded. Anyways, we talked for like 15 seconds after that and she leaned in to kiss me. We kissed for like four minutes. She then told me to have a good night and took off. As she pulled off she smiled at me and was gone. The next day she had to be up at 430am, didn't get home til 1230am. She said her shoulder was bothering her (she needs surgery bad), and that she was tired and didn't really want to talk that night for fear of taking her lousy day out on me. I said no problem and that I would talk to her tomorrow. She said definitely and we called it a night. That was yesterday. Today I text her in the morning, we text for a bit, then I tell her to call me, she does. We talk for about a half hour. She tells me that she has to quit smoking due to a medication and is stressed because of that. We wrap up the conversation and I tell her I'll text her later. I get home, shoot a text to call me whenever she likes. She calls me in minutes. She tells me that if she is distant over the next few days not to take it personal, as she is on her period, had to unexpectedly quit smoking and has been really bothered by her shoulder. I tell her no problem and that I wouldn't hold it against her. We talked for a minute, she did mention our upcoming date as if she intends on going. I guess the fact that we went from talking hours each night, to only for a little bit after the date, makes me feel a change occured. I could be over thinking this and really she doesn't want to talk to me, because she will be in a bad mood and doesn't want to take it out on me. I just don't really know. I like her a lot and I just am afraid maybe I moved too fast, or something. She disclosed not to take it personally if she is distant until after the five days of no smoking, should I take this at face value. Thank you for your input

Thank you to everybody who replied. She called me earlier and had to tell me something she was worried about telling me. In the end it doesn't matter to the possibility of us and its just something she has to work through. I asked if she was on board with trying to pursue an us and see where it goes, she said she was. We are going out on the 3rd and now that we both know we are on the same page and are interested in pursuing it, we'll see where it goes :)


Most Helpful Girl

  • you are way over thinking this. You should read your post on here and think, as an outsider to the situation, how would you respond? She seems very attentive to me and responds back almost immediately. She kisses you and says mentions the upcoming date.

    I think its a great sign and things are going great for you.

    But as I read your question, you seem a LITTLE bit over enthusiastic/needy to me.

    Like talking twice a day, or always telling her to call/text you. Know what I mean? I'm afraid you are going to come on too strong and overwhelm her. Just enjoy getting to know each other. But what do I know, this is just my opinion. :)

    • Well, it turns out that she had something she was afraid to tell me. In the grand scope of things, it doesn't change where we both stand. By her opening up to me, we were able to discuss what we feel about each other. Basically, she's interested in pursuing a relationship, as am I. We are just going to takes things as they come, not rush anything and enjoy each other and the future possibility of what it may become. So all in all, it's all good

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What Girls Said 2

  • It may seem like an eternity if you don't talk to her for a week. Actually it's not because your mind is so transfixed into her that you don't think about anything else. Do something to take the obsession off her mind and maybe out of the blue, she'll call you back. Sit Back, Relax and breathe.

    • Gonna just try to sit back and relax then. She initiated the hours of conversation, but I played along. I just really like this girl and want it to work out. Maybe I care too much

    • correction: off your mind. :-P

  • I think you're over thinking this. She clearly is going through some personal stuff and needs time to herself just to deal with all her stress. Don't worry too much about it. She clearly is looking forward to seeing you again and you both seem to get along fine. Just give her some time.


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